Beyond Arms Reach
by jellybeanpink84
Summary: Bella has just moved to the small town of Forks and meets the Cullens. But something is off because Bella already knows their secret. What really happened before she moved to Forks? What other secrets does she have? Eventually Bella x Edward. Rated M for mature conversations and subject matter.
1. Intro: Serving Time

Forks Washington.

I knew as I saw the sign that welcomed me to the tiny little town that it would never be my home and that I was never going to enjoy living there.

But I was here.

In my father – Charlie's - police cruiser. Making my way to the house that I was now being sentenced to live in, a house that I hadn't even visited in the past five years.

Thankfully the drive had been mostly silent, with Charlie driving quickly through the streets and to the little white house that I would now be required to live in while I carried out my sentence. A sentence imposed on me by Renee – my mother – and her new husband Phil who had remained happily in Arizona. The two of them far too happy to finally have me out of their lives, no longer spoiling the bliss of their honeymooning period.

We pulled up to the little white house and I groaned internally at the memories that assaulted me as soon as I saw it. Memories of a little girl playing by herself in her bedroom while her father ignored her, preferring instead to zone out in front of his television for hours at at time. I quickly shut down that train of thought and my hand twitched nervously towards the small metal object in my pocket. Feeling the outline of it there I resisted the urge to pull it out right at that moment as I stood in the front yard and reminded myself that I had later on to do that. It wouldn't be long until I would be alone.

"A couple of rules I want to remind you of Isabella." Charlie's gruff voice brought me out of my own thoughts and I nodded slightly for him to continue. "First is that there are absolutely no boys, no boyfriends. You go to school, you make good grades, you come home. You're old enough to take care of your own needs, clean up after yourself. And I got you a job at Newton's. You start Saturday." he told me sternly as I followed him in the house and upstairs to my room where he deposited my luggage and then turned around to leave before pausing, "oh... and what happened in Phoenix stays in Phoenix." he added before promptly making his way downstairs where I heard the old recliner groan as his weight sank into it and the television clicked on. At least I knew he wouldn't hover.

Forks.

Great.

_It's only for another year... then I can move out on my own, get away from them all._ I thought to myself and then I shuddered. _Only one more year of Hell. _

I pulled open my messenger bag that served as a purse, a knapsack, and a junk drawer. Flipping through the stacks of books and papers I pulled out the small envelop, opening it to reveal the single picture and gently traced the outline of his face before setting it on my nightstand. Before I sat down on the bed my hand felt down my hip until it got to my pocket, the cold metal touching my fingers and I could already feel the release before I yanked it out and rolled up my sleeve, just one more scar to add to the collection.


	2. Chapter 1: Nothing Left to Give

**Forks Secondary. Home of the Spartans. **

I read the sign out loud with a mocking boldness as I pulled into the school parking lot. I was driving in the ancient Chevy truck that Charlie had informed me that I could use while I was living with him. I had been beyond shocked when he had thrown the keys at me and told me to take care of it, that I would be driving it. But in truth I was also relieved that I wouldn't be forced to make the choice between getting rides with him in his police cruiser or walking... although if it came down to it, I'm sure walking would have been the preferable option.

I had gotten to the school early and planned to register and find my first class before the rest of the student population was able to detect the meat of a fresh student. My idea however was quickly foiled when I tripped on the hem of my jeans hopping out of my truck, my entire body flipping forward, tumbling hard to the ground and straight into a rather large, rather muddy, puddle.

Sighing I stood up and looked around to assess the damage as I tried my best to wipe myself off. Thankfully I was early enough that there was only a small scattering of students in the parking lot, all of whom were now staring at me, their eyes investigating the new – and apparently klutzy – girl without shame.

_Way to go Bella. _I shook my head and turned back to my truck, grabbing the linen bag that contained my spare clothes from the passenger side of the truck. I had learned early on in life that being clumsy often called for extra clothes... and I had been forced to use my spares more often than I wanted to admit.

"Excuse me," the older lady stationed behind the desk in the office jumped slightly when I spoke, her eyes quickly jumping to my face and her face quickly becoming a scowl as she looked over my mud-covered attire.

"You must be the Chief's daughter." her tone was harsh and disapproving. I nodded my head simply and fought her glare with one of my own, not backing down until she finally shifted her eyes uncomfortably and began to sort through the stack of paper on her desk, not stopping until she found what she was looking for and handed them over.

"Your schedule and a map of the school. Have each one of your teachers sign the bottom slip of paper and bring it back here at the end of the day." I didn't even bother looking at the papers before quickly turning and leaving her scrutinizing glare, heading outside before finally pulling out the school map and looking for my first class, hoping that there were at least bathrooms where I could get changed in the English building. I scanned the area quickly and found the small building with the large black number 3 painted on it and walked determinedly towards it.

By the time I had stuffed clothes in my bag and found my class, students were already beginning to file in and the teacher was at the desk, emptying his bag and preparing for the lesson.

"Isabella... right?" I jumped at the sound of my name and stopped midway into the room, turning to see a pimply faced dark haired boy with a smug expression on his face, obviously proud of his knowledge of my name.

"Yeah... Bella..." I pressed my lips together in a firm line and refused to make eye-contact with him. Not wanting to encourage him I didn't waste time turning bag to the front of the class and scurrying over to the teacher's desk.

"Isabella, welcome to Forks High and English class." Mr. Mason said without enthusiasm and handed me a sheet of paper – a reading list by the looks of it - before roughly pointing to a desk at the back of the desk and returning to his class preparations.

Sitting at the small square desk I glanced up at the clock and stifled a groan when I realized that there were still 5 minutes until the start of class. I picked up the reading list again and scanned it quickly, relief flooding me at the instant recognition – Bronte, Shakespeare, Chaucer, Faulkner – all titles that I had read at least once. At least this class would be easy.

"So Bella... I'm Eric..." the dark haired boy was back, leaning on a desk across the aisle from me and I tried not to roll my eyes at him. The last thing that I wanted was to make friends here. I was determined to do my time and then get the hell out, go somewhere to forget. I stared at the boy – Eric – blankly, waiting for him to say something else.

The silence became awkward.

Thankfully the bell rang and Eric jumped up, obviously relieved to be excused and returned to his seat up front.

The rest of my morning passed by in much the same manner. In each of my next two classes there always seemed to be a couple of students a little braver than the rest who would approach me and attempt to ask questions about the new girl – where I came from, how I liked Forks, invitations to sit with them at lunch.

The most annoying of these was a shorter girl with dark curly hair who kept insisting that I should stick with her and she would help me out. After politely declining her offer – for the third time - to sit with her group at lunch, her true colors began to show through when she turned her back to me and declared me a snob to the girl next to her.

I didn't let them bother me though. I wasn't here to make friends.

At lunch I debated returning to my truck and spending time by myself but I knew if I did that, it would be more than likely that I would end up ditching the rest of the day. It would be too tempting to drive back to Charlie's and lock myself in my room, the music cranked up, my fingers curled around his picture. No, I needed to go to the cafeteria and at least act normal... even if I knew I wasn't.

"I wouldn't sit there if I were you Bella..." one of the many voices that had approached me earlier called out and I turned to see the baby-faced boy with blond hair looking at me with a strange expression on his face.

"What's wrong with this table?" I asked as I continued to pull out a chair and sit down at the small round table.

"Nothing... just... that's the Cullen's table." As he said the words I tried to remember anyone by the name of Cullen from my classes and at the same time I watched as the color drained from the boy's face and he turned quickly, nearly running back to Jessica's table.

I spun my head around to try and understand his reaction and that's when I saw them, the word slipping out in a whisper before I could stop myself, "vampires", my hand moving quickly to cover my mouth.

They were standing in the doorway frozen, five of them. All of them with darkened eyes, a sure sign that they were thirsty.

It was easy to see the differences between them and the humans and while I remained frozen in my seat as they did in the door, the rest of the cafeteria seemed to be continuing on as normal, completely unaware of the danger, of the ongoing situation.

Finally they began to move again, little movements to try and act human, such as shifting from foot to foot while I watched the slight movement of their lips, a conversation too low and too fast for anyone else to take notice of. And I watched as the smallest of them, a tiny girl with short, dark, spiky hair, moved to grab onto the arm of the tall skinny one, the one with the unruly bronze hair.

I watched her as she gripped his arm and suddenly he went rigid, the big burly one on his left grabbing his other arm before they turned and quickly exited the building with him, leaving only the two blonds of the coven – a female who could have been a supermodel, her beauty exceptional – even for one of their kind. And the male, a frown spread across his face making him appear as though he was in extreme pain. He probably was.

I sat staring at them as they began to come closer to the table that I was sitting at, a decision I now regretted completely. I should have gone to my truck for lunch, I should have gone back to Charlie's.

"We need to talk." Her voice was as beautiful as her appearance but it held no warmth, only an icy-hardness and I debated running right then... would they take me out in the middle of a high-school cafeteria or would they wait... follow me home, take me out before I could reveal their secret?

"We aren't going to hurt you." I was surprised by the male's statement and I stared up at him in surprise, he was obviously thirsty, the pain of his burning throat obvious to anyone who really looked, but at the same time he seemed composed, calm.

"Fine." I huffed as I grabbed my bag and my tray and stood up, dumping the food in the trash before moving out the door they had all just come in from, the entire room strangely quiet around us.

"Where to?" I asked without looking back but sensing them behind me as we moved across the parking lot and I tossed my things in the bed of my truck roughly.

"This is fine." another female voice, softer, like the wind sounded and I stopped and turned to see her coming from the woods behind the school, dancing across the ground until she reached us.

"I'm Alice." the pixie-like girl said with a smile that seemed out of place on her face. She was a predator and I was her prey. She shouldn't be looking at me like that.

"Bella." I said simply and she smiled even wider at me.

I stared at her like she was insane. Maybe she was... if vampires could go insane that was.

"How do you know what we are?" The blond female demanded suddenly and I almost felt better sensing her anger, knowing that she wasn't trying to hide her true nature from me.

"You aren't the first ones I've come into contact with." I said dryly and at the same time rolled up my right sleeve, revealing the silver, crescent shaped scar on my wrist that was slightly colder than the rest of my body. A permanent reminder of the supernatural world and exactly what it was capable of.

"You aren't the first monsters that I've come across." I stated matter-of-factly, the memories of him causing me to wince in pain.

"Whoever did that to you... are they here?" the male asked and I watched as he stepped back towards the small pixie-like creature, his arm wrapping protectively around her.

"No. I haven't seen him in months... it happened in Arizona." I whispered but knew that they would hear me.

"What happened in Arizona?" The male questioned and I tried to blink back the tears that immediately sprang to my eyes.

"What do you want from me?" My voice cracked as I asked the million dollar question and I tried not to grimace at the thought of what they might want me to do for them.

Nobody answered my question, all eyes remaining on me as I began to fidget nervously, the air thickening with the tension, nearly choking me.

"Let her get back to class Rose," the little one spoke up first and I looked at her closely. Her demeanor seemed soft and friendly but I knew better than to trust them. "She won't say anything." Surprisingly enough I believed that they would listen to the pixie, the air of confidence surrounding her when she spoke assuring me of it.

"It's alright Bella. We'll talk more later." she spoke to me and I looked at the other two questioningly before turning and practically running across the parking lot and back into the school. I went directly to my next class, the room empty upon my arrival and I sank down onto the first stool I could find, my head falling to the cold lab table, my heart still pounding in my chest.

My mind started racing, trying to understand what had just happened.

They had left me alive.

They would want something from me.

I didn't have anything left to give.

**A/N: This is chapter one of a new fic I've been working on just a little here and there based on some random ideas I've had. I don't know how often I'll update as I really want to work some more on finishing the multiple other stories I have up already, but I'll aim for at least one update every 1-2 weeks. Hint: The more reviews I get, the more often I'll update :)**

**** All Twilight references, characters, etc... belong to the talent Stephenie Meyer. I'm just borrowing them for some fun ideas that I had. **


	3. Chapter 2: Price of Silence

The rest of the afternoon passed by in a blur. It was obvious that what happened hadn't gone unnoticed by the student population and things had changed after my confrontation with the Cullens. I was no longer the mysterious new girl who everyone wanted to know about. Now they were all avoiding me like I was the plague. I was fine with that.

By the end of the day I was finally beginning to breathe a little easier when I hadn't seen any of the Cullens again, but I also knew that it didn't mean much. Looking over my shoulder in paranoia wasn't going to help me much now, but still I did it, watching for any sign of them as I left the small school and drove quickly through the tiny town of Forks.

I shouldn't have been surprised to see the black car parked in my driveway and three of them on my porch when I got home, a slightly older looking couple standing with the _students _I had met earlier in the day.

But I was surprised.

It wasn't the fact that they were there obviously waiting for me that scared me. It was actually quite the opposite... it was how composed, how normal they looked. Like a family visiting with friends or relatives, their clothes expensive and their expressions varied.

"Might as well come in..." I muttered as I jumped out of my truck and of course stumbled slightly before I could catch my footing. Luckily I didn't face-plant in the mud again, but there were still twenty steps to the door... it could still happen.

"You must be Isabella..." the new male extended his hand towards me as I got closer to the house and I felt my mouth hang open at the gesture, the motion seeming so foreign coming from these creatures.

"Yeah, come on in." I tried to compose myself and continue on, ignoring the outstretched hand and unlocking the front door, letting myself in and leaving the door open for them to follow me.

"Uh... you can have a seat in there," I pointed roughly to the living room before continuing on down the hall and into the kitchen, grabbing a bottle of water from the fridge before coming back to the room where they were all posed awkwardly. Leaning on the door frame I scanned the room, taking in each of them and waiting patiently for one of them to begin.

"Let me begin by introducing myself," the older male who was presumably the coven leader began after several very long minutes of silence, "My name is Carlisle Cullen," the pride with which he introduced himself once again startled me and I shook my head in wonder... they were definitely different from the vampires that I had previously experienced. "My wife Esme," the woman who was holding his hand was beautiful and when I took the time to examine her heart shaped face it was almost enough to convince me right there that they wouldn't hurt me, she just seemed so soft... so gentle. "And I believe you met Rosalie and Alice at the school earlier," he gestured to the tall blond and the small pixie and I nodded my head. "And this is Emmett," the largest of the bunch shocked me when he let out a huge grin and my confusion at their reactions doubled.

"Who was the other guy at the school... the blond?" I couldn't control my curiosity and the question popped out of my mouth without thought. "That was Jasper," Alice... the pixie... smiled at me and I continued to look at them like they were insane.

"And Red?" I was the most curious about him... about his reaction in the cafeteria, about his absence here now. The vampires present in the room all looked like they were trying to stifle a laugh when I asked the question and I tried to understand what could be funny about it.

"That was Edward." Esme answered me kindly and I still didn't understand the snickers coming from the big burly one and the supermodel.

"What do you want from me?" I asked for not the first time and then it was their turn to look at each other in confusion.

"Isabella..."

"Just Bella." I interrupted Carlisle in aggravation.

"Bella..." he paused nervously, "Bella... Rosalie and Alice informed us this afternoon that you know what we are. Would you be willing to share with us what else you know and how you know it?" The question was asked in a cautious manner, but I didn't feel as though it was an interrogation, like I would be forced to answer if I didn't want to.

"I ran into one of your kind in Arizona. I learned a lot from him." I answered honestly but left out all of the details. What happened in Arizona was none of their business.

"Look. I don't know what is going on... why you want to know this from me and I don't really care right now. I know what you are and I know what you are capable of. So please... just either spit out what you want from me or kill me and get it over with." I blurted out, frustrated with the waiting. There were several startled gasps around me followed by another awkward silence.

"Bella... we don't kill people." Esme's voice was filled with sadness as she spoke the phrase and I braced myself for what I knew would come next.

Without saying a word I rolled my sleeve up and held out my arm, taking a deep breath to prepare myself for the pain that would accompany it. "Go on then... take what you need and get on with it." I said bitterly and squeezed my eyes closed... waiting.

"Bella no!" Alice's voice was suddenly loud and my eyes burst open when I felt the cold of her hand grabbing my arm and yanking my sleeve back down.

"Bella... we don't drink from humans at all." Carlisle's voice was calm but I could sense an underlying hint of disgust coming from his tone.

For a moment I considered his words. If they didn't drink from humans... how could they even be vampires?

"I... I don't understand." I finally stuttered out, their words still replaying in my head. "If you don't kill people, and you don't drink from humans... then... then what are you? Why are you here? What do you want from me?" Somewhere during my rant I had begun to yell and pushed off the door frame, pacing the floor back and forth while they watched me curiously.

"We're different from the rest of our kind dear," Esme's kind voice caused me to turn abruptly and stare at her, "We don't drink from humans, we maintain a diet of animal blood." she clarified and I wondered if this was really even possible.

"And Bella, well, we don't want anything from you exactly. But as I'm sure you are aware from your experience with our kind, our secrecy is extremely important. Alice," he gestured to the girl who was still smiling at me, "thought it best that we come to assess your knowledge before deciding whether to stay here or leave the area." Carlisle continued for his wife and I returned to pacing the floor of the living room, my own thoughts nearly overwhelming me.

"So... all you want from me is to keep your secret?" I asked once I had gathered my thoughts somewhat coherently together.

"Essentially... yes." Rosalie spoke up, her face showing her impatience with our conversation.

"If that's all you need... then you don't need to worry. I wouldn't say anything to anybody." I looked down at my hands and tried to push back the memories that were floating to the surface of my mind. "As far I'm concerned... if you really don't want anything from me... I am happy to pretend that you don't exist."

"We appreciate that very much." Carlisle and Esme stood up then and I wondered if that was really all that they wanted from me... a simple vow of secrecy and they would leave me alone? And why hadn't they just fled when I had found out about them... that's what most vampires would have done.

"That's it then? You really don't want anything else from me?" I couldn't stop the question from popping out and I heard Rosalie scoff from behind me, something about my words obviously offending to her.

"Yes, I'm very sorry if we gave you any other impression. We really don't mean you any harm." Esme's voice was still filled with warmth as she gave me a sad smile and bowed her head, excusing herself from the room, followed quickly by Carlisle.

"Oh Bella..." Alice stopped following Rosalie and Emmett halfway out the door and turned back to me, her eyes full of questions and I braced myself. This was it.

"Maybe we could hang out sometime?"

**A/N: Enjoy and please review, let me know what you think!**

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	4. Chapter 3: Ice

"_**Oh Bella..." Alice stopped following Rosalie and Emmett halfway out the door and turned back to me, her eyes full of questions and I braced myself. This was it. **_

"_**Maybe we could hang out sometime?"**_

"Bella? Are you home?" Charlie's rough voice and stomping boots interrupted my train of thought and I glanced up at the clock on the mantle. I hadn't realized how long I had been sitting there stunned following my visit with the strange Cullen _family. _

"Yeah... in here Charlie..." I shook my head and began to stand up as he peered around the door and into the room, his eyes searching the area, as though looking for something.

"You been here since you got back from school?" He asked and as I shifted my weight awkwardly, wanting to go upstairs to my room but not able to as he blocked the doorway.

"Yeah... sorry... I must have dozed off." I lied when I realized that my school things were all still scattered around the room. I began to move towards the door, planning on just going around Charlie and heading up to my room for the rest of the night.

"Dinner ready?" he grabbed my arm to stop me and I spun around to face him, the pain from his grip on my arm causing my temper to flare.

"I'm not hungry." I spoke through clenched teeth and I felt his grip on my arm only get stronger. I knew this would leave a large bruise and I could feel the dampness as one of the cuts on my upper arm opened up and began to bleed.

"You aren't here for a vacation Isabella." I straightened up and prepared myself for whatever he felt he needed to stay. "I expect certain things from you while you are here and one of those things is a hot meal when I get home from working my ass off all day." His words were spoken calmly but it only made me realize how serious he was and as his grip shifted, pushing me away from him and towards the stairs I suddenly felt afraid of what he might do.

"Tonight's your one and only free pass." he spat at me and I fell back as I tried to regain my footing, my leg twisting and causing me to fall and smash my forehead on banister.

I could have sworn that Charlie's mouth turned up into a smirk at my clumsiness before he turned his back on me and I heard the door to the refrigerator open and then slam closed, a can snapping open before he moved back past me and into the living room.

Holding the wall for balance I shifted my weight and stood up carefully, the instant dizziness making it difficult for me to stay upright while I regained my strength. It took all of my energy to climb the stairs and collapse on my bed in my room, the tears that I had struggled to hold in all the way up finally bursting through the dam as my hand found his picture and the tiny silver blade.

–

The days passed by slowly. My life consisted of school and home... cooking for Charlie and then disappearing to my bedroom before he could take his anger and his temper out on me for whatever had pissed him off at work.

On Saturday I started my new job at Newton's Outfitters where I found out I would be subjected to work with the persistently annoying Mike Newton from school every Saturday and Sunday for the duration of my sentence. But I could handle Mike... the money I was making working for his parents would be good for when I was finally able to get away from Forks... from Charlie and when I was at work I didn't have to worry about being in his presence.

After my first day of school the Cullens also left me alone but I knew they were watching me, as though waiting for me to say something... to give them an excuse to end my miserable existence. And still I waited, watching over my shoulder for something to happen, for them to decide it was time for me to be useful to them.

"Bella?" I jumped slightly at the sound of my name as I got out of my truck and I felt my feet slide out from under me, my ass hitting the ground and the back of my head hitting the side of my truck.

"Oh Bella!" Her cold hand was on my shoulder as she knelt down beside me and stared into my face, her own so close that I could feel her breath on my cheek. I flinched back slightly and pushed myself up, attempting to stand.

"Stay there for a minute... you hit your head." Alice kept her hand on my shoulder but backed away slightly, sensing my fear even though I tried to hide it.

"I'm fine. Let me up." I demanded firmly and she moved her hand slowly, as though unsure of what to do.

Finally I stood up and brushed myself off, the dampness from the slush I had landed in already seeping through my jeans.

"I'm sorry Bella... I didn't mean to startle you." I reached into the truck for my spare clothes and when I turned back to her I was surprised by the look of remorse on her face. Her head was hung low and she seemed truly sorry.

"Don't worry about it... it happens all the time." I pretended it didn't bother me, and honestly it _did_ happen quite frequently.

Slamming the door to the truck I began to walk towards the school, cautious of every step as I navigated across the random patches of ice. Ice and clumsiness did not get along well.

"So I was wondering..." I knew that she had been walking beside me and my confusion just continued to get stronger when she began speaking to me... so did my anxiety. "Did you want to hang out sometime?" Again her words surprised me and I stopped in my tracks, turning to look into her eyes, to see the strange, unfamiliar gold colour looking at me expectantly, a kind of excitement flashing in them.

I didn't answer her and kept walking, not knowing what to think of her question.

"We could go out... see a movie... go to the mall..." she sounded nervous the longer she continued, the more things she suggested to me without a response.

"I don't go out much." I finally answered her simply and truthfully and I watched as her face fell, the disappointment obvious.

"You could just come over to our place and hang out?" she offered after a minute of silence and I shook my head slightly before responding to her.

"Look. Just tell me what it is that you want!" I was getting angrier by the minute and my body was aching from my earlier fall. "Your _kind..." _I lowered my voice so that I wouldn't cause a scene as we entered the English building and moved towards the girls' room. "Don't 'hang out' and to be honest your 'let's be friends' attitude is kinda freaking me out a little bit." I flung open the door to the girls room and when I looked back to Alice her face was still lowered, her eyes glistening with what looked like tears but what I knew were really pools of venom that would never fall, and she looked... hurt.

"I'm sorry Bella..." she bit down on her bottom lip in a strangely human fashion while it looked like she debated saying something else before she turned suddenly and walked away from me.

I changed my clothes quickly and left the washroom with the intent to go about my classes as usual but when I saw the crowd standing by the English door and waiting to be let in I changed my mind, not able to handle being surrounded by people at the moment. Instead I made my way back out to the parking lot and my truck where I decided I would sit through first period to calm down.

I was almost at my truck when I heard it. The sound of squealing tires followed by a scream from somewhere in the parking lot right before I turned and all sounds, all thought was lost to me when I saw the van skidding directly for me, the face of the driver shocked, most likely mimicking my own.

"Bella!" It was the only thing that I heard as the stone collided with me from the side... and not the front as I was expecting and I hit the ground, my mind shutting down, blackness covering me as I watched Alice's face, filled with concern drop me and then turn away, her hands raised as though to brace for impact.

–

"Is she going to be alright?" I recognized the voice but not the concern associated with it as my sense began to return to me, my head pounding as I felt the icy fingers probing around my scalp.

"She hit her head pretty hard but overall I think Bella is very lucky that her truck as there to take most of the impact. It could have been much worse." I tried to understand what he was saying and knew that my truck had nothing to do with what had happened.

"Isabella's got to head down to x-ray now... why don't you go down to the cafeteria and grab a bite to eat Charlie?" I kept my eyes closed while I listened to the sound of Charlie's heavy boots stomping out of the room and down the hall.

"I know you're awake Bella. Why don't you open your eyes so we can have a little chat?" I peeked out from one eye carefully and saw Carlisle Cullen sitting in the chair next to the bed, wearing a white lab coat, a small badge identifying him as _Dr. Cullen_ hanging from his left pocket.

"You're a doctor?" I blurted out, disbelief coloring my tone.

"Yes, I'm sorry. I should have mentioned that sooner." He apologized and then his face turned serious and I cringed back at the look.

"Bella..." he began softly, unnaturally, "Bella... I understand that you don't trust us and I understand your fear." I nodded my head and began picking at the blanket nervously, my face paling when he finally asked the question.

"When you were brought in today though Bella we did a basic exam and I was hoping you would talk to me about a few things... mainly why you are covered in bite marks."

**A/N: Enjoy and please review, let me know what you think!**

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	5. Chapter 4: Inquisition

"_**When you were brought in today though Bella we did a basic exam and I was hoping you would talk to me about a few things... mainly why you are covered in bite marks."**_

Star.

The star is shifting... morphing into a small yellow butterfly.

Butterfly morphs into a...

"Bella." the small yellow stain on the ceiling is back to looking like what it really is and I sigh loudly, turning my head to look back at the blond vampire who is still sitting in the chair beside the bed, waiting for me to say something. To answer his question.

"I thought I had to go to x-ray." I said stubbornly instead.

I could see the frustration on his face and it still confused me. I had no idea why he would even care at all... and the fact that he was in the hospital posing as a doctor in the first place something beyond absurd.

"Bella..." he paused as though he wasn't sure what the best way to say what he was thinking. "As I said before, I understand your hesitancy to trust us not to hurt you. But from the number of bite marks, the self inflicted wounds, and the non-self inflicted bruises I know that whatever it was that happened was traumatic for you. Right now I'm not going to force you to talk about anything, but I do think it would do you some good to open up to someone, to release everything that I'm sure that you are bottling up inside of you." I blinked back the tears and tried to keep my front up, the toughness that I had developed to fight against any form of caring, against the prying eyes.

Just as Carlisle stood up a nurse knocked lightly on the wall before pushing back the curtain and entering my cubicle, a chart in her hands and the surprise evident on her face when she saw him in the room with me.

After blushing and stuttering through her apology she helped me into a wheelchair and I was taken down the hall, the tears beginning to trickle down my cheek and not stopping while the technicians took their images. They didn't stop until I was done and the nurse was pushing me back to my room where I nearly threw up when I saw Charlie there... waiting for me.

After my results came back with nothing broken and only a slight concussion I was released and the drive back to the house was silent as I sat in the passenger side of Charlie's cruiser, his anger at me for what he called _my little stunt_ obvious and yet strangely calming to me.

When we returned to the house I tried to sneak upstairs quietly to my room but I should have known that Charlie wouldn't let me off that easily. The second that the door was slammed behind him I felt his grip on my throat as my back was pinned against the wall, my airways tight but not completely cut off.

"If you ever pull something like that again..." his words were cut off by my cry of pain when his knee slammed into my stomach and I felt my stomach lurch, wanting to get sick but unable to with his hands still wrapped tightly around my throat. Instead the bile sat there, burning my throat and causing me to grab at his hands, trying to pry him off of me.

_Please... just kill me... just put me out of this misery. _I begged silently as the time ticked by, our position still the same aside from my hands, desperate to make him either let go or to tighten his hold.

"Worthless." he spat the words at the same time he released me, his hands disappearing from my neck, my body slumping to the ground in a heap.

"Stay away from those Cullen kids too. I don't like 'em." his words told me he was finished with me for now as I fought against the black cloud that was beginning to overtake me, forcing myself to push back up and slowly crawl up the stairs to my room. It felt like it took hours and my body was heavy by the time I collapsed on the hardwood, half in my room and half in the upstairs hallway where the darkness once again consumed me.

"Bella!" her shrill cry barely pierced my consciousness and her cold hands which normally would have jolted me wide awake, only served to comfort me as my mind faded back out.

The next time I opened my eyes it was to the sudden warm air that blasted me, the heavy warmth that blanketed me and while I waited for my head to stop pounding I listened.

"How could you bring her here Alice?" I didn't recognize the voice that almost sounded like a hiss and I felt a spark of anger at the fact that Alice had taken me anywhere before I realized that it didn't really matter.

"He did this to her. I couldn't just leave her there for him to finish off any time he felt like it." her high pitched voice was angry and I could feel the venom, the spark of hatred in her words. "Besides... you're fine Edward." her voice softened slightly and I wondered where exactly 'here' was.

"Actually Alice... Edward and I need to leave... now." I recognized the slight southern drawl and felt myself shudder, my body instinctively aware of the danger I was in at this moment.

The room was silent but I could sense that Alice was still near me and I tried to wake myself up further and demand that she take me back to Charlie's. But as I tried to roll onto my side and push myself up a sudden wave of nausea hit and I felt myself begin to retch, Alice's cold hand quickly pulling my hair back from my face, her other hand holding a decorative garbage pail in front of my lips.

"Alice? What's going on? What's happened?"

She didn't answer them immediately, instead passing me a cloth to wipe my mouth and helping me to lay back on what I now realized was a couch, several pillows now placed behind my head for support.

"I need to get back home before Charlie realizes that I'm not there." I whispered and felt the ache in my throat as the air passed through it, my voice dry and strained with the effort to speak.

"Bella I can't..."

"Yes you can and you have to Alice. Take me back to my house." I glared angrily at her and saw just the slightest movement of her lips, words obviously not directed to me but to the other vampires in the room.

I turned my head to see Esme and Carlisle standing just inside the doorway, their faces both concerned as they looked between Alice and I. When Carlisle's mouth began to move silently I rolled my eyes and moved to sit up further, swinging my legs over the edge of the couch and onto the plush carpet.

I could see Alice moving to stop me, her mouth about to open further, to a more audible level but I beat her to it, "First you bring me here without my permission and now you don't even have the courtesy to speak loud enough for me to hear you." I felt my anger spike back up and Carlisle moved further into the room, stopping when he was within reach of my arms.

"I'm sorry Bella. I was only telling Carlisle why I brought you back here... how I found you unconscious in your house after your father hurt you." Alice did look apologetic but something about the strange glint in her eyes and the way that she spoke told me that she wasn't. That she was the type of person who was stubborn and did what she thought was right no matter what.

The room was silent for a moment while Carlisle looked hesitantly back at Esme before turning once again to face me and speaking, "What exactly happened after you left the hospital today Bella?" he asked and I pulled back into the couch, wishing that they would all just leave me alone.

"Bella?" Carlisle prompted softly and I pursed my lips stubbornly.

"We just want to help you Bella," Esme's soft voice floated to me from the doorway and I made the mistake of looking up at her, into her gentle face, her saddened eyes.

"He just grabbed me... held me against the wall for a minute." without thinking my hand began to rub my throat, the sore spots that I guessed were covered in bruises the shape of Charlie's hands. Carlisle moved forward and paused, his hand poised above my own before I nodded and allowed him to inspect the bruises closer.

"You were unconscious when Alice found you... did you hit your head again?" he asked gently and I nodded my head in reply, the words stuck in my throat.

Moving smoothly around to the back of the couch he softly tilted my head down and began to probe the back of my skull, pressing gently until he hit the sore spot and I bit down on my lip to avoid crying out, pulling forward and away from him.

"Did he do anything else Bella?" Carlisle's face was impassive but his eyes showed his concern... an emotion that still seemed out of place among these creatures.

"He kneed me in the stomach before he dropped me." it was barely a whisper and more than I thought that I would ever tell anybody... more than I should have said, "that's all." I added so that he wouldn't continue his inquisition.

"Bella I can't let you return to your father's house knowing that he is hurting you." If I hadn't been so tired I would have laughed at the statement that Carlisle made, instead I only managed a slight chuckle before I argued against him.

"You can and you will. I'm only stuck here until I'm eighteen and then I'm gone... Charlie isn't that bad and this is the worst it's ever been. I have dealt with far worse treatment from vampires than Charlie could ever dish out so you need to take me home now before Charlie realizes I'm gone."

The room was silent when I finished and I saw Esme back silently out of the room, her face looking as though she was nearly crying.

"At least allow Alice to stay with you so that she can wake you up regularly. I'm concerned about your concussion... especially with the additional blow that you took tonight." Carlisle's voice was hesitant and Alice looked ready to explode at his suggestion.

"Fine. But she can't let Charlie see her." I grumbled and stood, swaying slightly and glaring at the two vampires, daring them to try and stop me from walking on my own.

Alice was fuming... that much was obvious as she sped us through town in the shiny black car and I tried to avoid looking at her. I had a feeling that when she was angry she was a force to be reckoned with.

When we pulled up down the street from my house I was surprised when she held out her arms, her foot beginning to tap impatiently as she waited for me and I shrugged my shoulders before she reached over and grabbed me. I didn't have a chance to blink before we were across the yard and into the house by way of my bedroom window.

I didn't bother changing into pajamas, kicking off my jeans and climbing into my bed, Alice still not saying anything to me as I shifted around until I was comfortable enough.

"You can go home you know... I'm fine." I muttered as I closed my eyes, my breathing already slowing down as I felt sleep creeping up on me.

"I'm staying to make sure you're okay Bella." it almost sounded as though it was a 'duh' statement; something that was obvious and that I should have known without her pointing it out.

"Why?" Sleep was coming fast and I struggled to stay awake, to hear her answer.

"Because you're important to our family Bella..."

My mind was shutting down and her words seemed to stick in my head, just as the blackness closed in and sleep took over I thought I heard her whisper, "You'll be a Cullen someday..." and then the dreams began.

**A/N: I know this is moving a little slow, don't worry though, Edward will be entering the storyline soon :) Anyways - Enjoy and please review, let me know what you think!**

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	6. Chapter 5: Nightmare

"_**Because you're important to our family Bella..." **_

_**My mind was shutting down and her words seemed to stick in my head, just as the blackness closed in and sleep took over I thought I heard her whisper, "You'll be a Cullen someday..." and then the dreams began.**_

_It was dark in the room but somehow I could sense him there with me, the hair on my arms was standing straight up at the thought, disgust rolling through me. _

_The room I was in was familiar, the slightly stale, musty smell, the sound of the furnace clicking on, the hard concrete floor that I was curled up on. My head was pounding and I wondered briefly how I had gotten down here, why I was here. From somewhere beside me I could hear a raspy, shallow breathing and my confusion hit me, who else was here with me. _

"_Ah, you're awake." his voice was soft and alluring but I knew better. I knew what he was and what he wanted. I also knew it would do me no good to scream, to fight._

"_You've been a naughty girl while I was away." his voice was still soft but this time it held just a hint of malice and as the light slammed on I squeezed my eyes tightly shut, the sharp light completely blinding me. I didn't doubt that he knew, he had a sense about things and when it came to his property... well, he was very possessive._

"_Bella?" my eyes were still closed when I heard his voice gasp my name and they shot open, blinking rapidly, fighting the blinding light to search for him. _

"_No!" I screamed when my eyes finally found him, his body crumpled up on the floor across from me, blood pooled in a dark circle around his head. _

"Bella!" the voice didn't fit in my dream and as the colors began to fade back into darkness I heard his screams, my heart crying out in agony, my inability to help him... to save him still causing unbearable pain.

"Bella, wake up." I felt her cold hands on my shoulders, shaking me gently, her hushed voice filled with worry.

"What is it Alice?" I moaned groggily, too drained emotionally and physically to deal with the tiny pixie.

"You were screaming and crying out in your sleep. If I didn't wake you up then your father would have come in... it wouldn't have been good." she whispered apologetically. I rubbed my hands roughly across my face, trying to wake myself up a little bit more.

"What do you mean he would have come in?" Something was clicking in my head and although it was still far too foggy for me to understand what, I knew that there was something that I was missing about this annoying little vampire.

"I mean... you were pretty loud, and Charlie's awake. If you had kept going he _probably_ would have come up and I get the feeling he isn't the kind of guy to just check on you to make sure that everything is alright." she amended and I tried to fight the tiredness and understand what it was that she wasn't saying but I was still too exhausted.

"What time is it?" I asked her tiredly and then glanced at the clock, answering my own question – it was five in the morning.

"Can I ask..." I tried to close my eyes and ignore her question, I didn't want to talk about my dreams and I had a feeling that was exactly what she wanted to do. "Bella... who is Weston?" she asked anyways and instantly I felt my eyes swell with tears at the mention of his name, the feelings of guilt that always accompanied my dreams growing even stronger.

"Bella?" She prompted when I didn't answer, instead choosing to turn my head to the window, to the darkness that stared back at me, to the sound of the rain tapping gently on the roof of the house.

Alice didn't relent though, instead choosing to watch me, her fingers twirling the hem of her shirt nervously as she waited next to me, the dim light of the room not letting me see her expression, only feel it boring into me.

"Weston is... he was... my best friend." I swallowed thickly and felt a tear trickle softly down my cheek, my hand moving quickly to wipe it away. But it was useless as more tears just followed, the dam broken from the sound of his name on my tongue.

"I'm so sorry Bella," Alice whispered softly and I felt her shift on the bed, turning to me as though about to offer me a hug of some sort but unsure of whether or not it would be accepted. I didn't react and when she saw that I wasn't moving away from her she did it, expected but unexpected as her cold arms wrapped me up and I cried even harder at the familiar feeling.

"I... I'm sorry." I sniffled as I pulled back, angry at myself for showing my weakness. I grabbed a kleenex off of my nightstand and angrily tried to dry off my cheeks.

"I have to ask Bella... was it... was it one of us that... that..." I didn't let her finish nodding my head quickly and saying the words for her. "He was killed by a vampire... but it was my fault. It was because of me." The tears were flowing again, a steady torrent down my face and Alice's eyes were glistening with moisture, as though she understood and could empathize with me. But she couldn't understand. It was so much more than I had told her, than I could ever tell her.

Opening her mouth to say something more she froze and I watched as she whipped her head around to the door and then she was up, moving so fast that my eyes couldn't follow where she had gone.

"Close your eyes, pretend to be asleep." she hissed from somewhere on the other side of the room and I obeyed, the sound of Charlie's boots stomping up the stairs suddenly helping me to understand her quick movements.

"Girl?" He called out at the same time as the door was flung open and I shot up in bed, pretending that he had woken me up. "Who else is in here?" he demanded and I stumbled for something to say, some way to convince him that I was alone.

"What is it? What's going on?" I feigned grogginess instead but he was already at the bed, my throat in his hands as he held me there, preventing anything else from escaping my lips. While he sat there, his grip painfully tight his eyes darted around the room and I prayed that Alice was no where within sight.

"Someone in here?" he demanded, his eyes turning back to me. I tried to squeak out a _'no' _ as a reply but the word wouldn't come out. Shifting my head slightly from side to side he seemed to accept my answer and released me, the sudden rush of air making my lungs burn as I took several gulps.

"If I ever catch anyone in here..." he trailed off threateningly and I nodded my head to assure him that I understood his implications.

"Are you alright Bella?" her voice sounded unsure as she appeared beside me and I felt my body shaking, a shiver rippling through me as I tried to calm myself down. I glanced nervously at the door, knowing that Charlie's boots had stomped back downstairs and that with the television on and our voices hushed he wouldn't hear us, but still fearful anyways.

"I'm fine." my whispers came out sharper than I had wanted them to and Alice backed up a little bit, but her eyes were watching me closely.

After the incident with Charlie I didn't even attempt to fall back asleep and while Alice stayed with me until it was time to get ready for school, we didn't speak very much. She attempted at first to ask me questions but I wasn't open to sharing any more than I already had and I could tell that she was frustrated with my lack of answers. But I couldn't let her know anything else, she had already attempted to get me to leave Charlie, offering me Carlisle's assistance and some sort of strange vampire protection from their family. It was the sort of thing that I didn't need. I just needed to keep going, to save up until I could get away from Forks, away from Charlie and away from vampires.

The next morning at school was thankfully uneventful. I had been half expecting Alice to show up once I had pulled into the parking lot and follow me around, but I didn't see her or any of the Cullens over the course of the morning. Part of the reason for that could have been that I was trying my hardest not to look for them, and at lunch time instead of eating in the cafeteria I chose to sit in my truck alone, my head resting against the steering wheel. As usual I debated on whether or not to even attend my afternoon classes, knowing that I would only sit there, not really taking anything in as the teacher drabbled on about things that I had no interest in learning. But I also knew that if I did that it would most likely get back to Charlie, and Charlie would be beyond angry for any other '_stunts_' that I pulled.

Walking into my biology class following my quiet lunch I was expecting the looks that the rest of the students gave me as I passed silently by them. It had been like the first day of school all over again, only now I was the survivor of an almost fatal accident, nearly crushed by a van, worthy of sympathetic looks and offers to sit with me. A second chance to get in with the crowd of my choice... to prove myself one of them.

What I didn't expect though was for a vampire to be sitting at the lab table that had quickly become '_Bella's Table', _his face scrunched up in concentration as he watched me slow down and take a deep breath before moving the rest of the way towards him, my instincts telling me that I should be leaving the room, leaving the town. Of course I had heard the rumors about Edward Cullen since my first day at Forks. I knew that there had been speculation on why he had suddenly been absent from all of his classes... apparently more so than usual. I knew that he was supposed to be in my biology class, but I also had assumed that he had decided to just skip the monotonous lessons and stay away from me. Apparently I was wrong.

His gaze seemed to go right through me and the more I tried to ignore him, the more intrigued I also became.

It was uncomfortable as we both sat there in silence, our faces turned towards the front of the classroom and the teacher who was droning on and on, but every so often our eyes would meet, awkwardly darting away from each other every time.

The part that bothered me the most was that I couldn't read him, his expression was changing constantly, but there was nothing about it that seemed to be aggressive. It was strange, his eyes were black with thirst as he swallowed back venom compulsively, his hands clenched into fists as they held the lab table from underneath, a small pile of dust accumulating under him... yet for some reason I felt oddly safe in his presence.

Finally I couldn't take it anymore and as the teacher sat down, instructing us to begin the lab he had been explaining, my mouth opened up and the first question I could think of spewed out.

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?" he pulled back slightly, appearing surprised before he pulled the lab materials forward on the desk and began to look into the microscope. I was beginning to think that he wasn't going to answer me at all when he finally spoke up.

"I'm sorry, I don't mean to be rude." He must have been holding his breath because once the words were spoken he turned his head to the side, his shoulders heaving as he pulled in a deep breath, his grip tightening on the wooden table.

"It's okay... I can... I can leave... if it's easier." I stuttered slightly and even though everything in me was telling me to just get up and go, telling me that he was the most dangerous of all of the strange vampires – I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay, I wanted to find out why he was putting himself through this to sit in a class where he was obviously struggling against his very nature.

"No. I'm fine. I promise I won't hurt you." his grip loosened just slightly and even though he was now sitting further away from me, he did seem a little bit more composed.

I didn't know what else to say so instead I continued on with the work in front of us, not expecting him to say anything further.

"I'm Edward Cullen, by the way." he offered somewhat awkwardly and I tried to stay focused on what I was doing, writing down my observations and continuing on with our work.

"I'm Bella." I answered cautiously, waiting to see if he would say anything else. His voice was polite and soft, but there was something behind the expected alluring tone of his voice that caught my attention.

I found I wanted to talk to him.

And I wanted him to talk back.

**A/N: What do you think... a few things happened in this chapter and Edward has finally entered the story. Hope you enjoyed, read and review please!**

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	7. Chapter 6: The Bump

"_**I'm Edward Cullen, by the way." he offered somewhat awkwardly and I tried to stay focused on what I was doing, writing down my observations and continuing on with our work.**_

"_**I'm Bella." I answered cautiously, waiting to see if he would say anything else. His voice was polite and soft, but there was something behind the expected alluring tone of his voice that caught my attention. **_

_**I found I wanted to talk to him. **_

_**And I wanted him to talk back. **_

I had thought that time had been moving slowly before. But now, with my new found _friends_ time seemed to nearly stop; Each day, every hour, passing by and becoming even more unbearable.

My relationship with the Cullens was strange. Alice still attempted to befriend me, constantly inviting me over or offering to come to my place to keep me company. In a way it would have been nice to be able to talk to someone, to share things with her that I would never be able to talk to anyone else about. But I kept her out, I didn't need to make friends – especially ones who weren't human, beings who were capable of such destruction.

The others weren't as obvious in their interest of me, but I could still see them watching me, could sense them near me. I tried my best to avoid them, to pretend that I wasn't just as interested in them and their strange diet, their golden eyes and their unusual way of life. But as often as I would catch them eying me from across the room, I was sure that they also caught me doing the exact same thing to them.

And then there was Edward. As much as I didn't want to let any of them in... Edward was the exception and thoughts of him were constantly trying to worm their way into my mind. Edward was back to attending his classes regularly and while we hadn't spoken more than a word or two since that first time, I felt somehow drawn to him. That feeling terrified me.

I tried not to spend too much time thinking about him, about the feelings that surfaced whenever he was near me. I knew that Charlie wouldn't approve of him or anyone getting close to me, and the one thing that I didn't need was more of a reason for Charlie to be angry and take his temper out on me. As it was I had bruises that never seemed to heal, old yellow bruises constantly being covered by fresh purplish ones. He didn't ever seem to need a reason to hurt me and the more resilient I became during his fits of anger, the worse things were getting. But I refused to give in and cry or fight against him. I refused to let him break me further.

"Bella? Are you feeling alright?" his soft voice startled me and I jumped up on the stool, my hands moving back to my head immediately. It had been pounding all day and was the reason why I was spending my lunch break in the empty biology lab, resting it against the cool black table.

"Fine..." I grumbled before putting my head back down, the spinning room causing me to feel sick to my stomach.

For a minute I thought that he had left again, the space around me eerily quiet, the only sounds coming from the occasional student walking down the hall outside the room.

"Bella?" he whispered at the same time as I felt his icy touch on my head, gentle but firm. Instantly the cold began to seep through the pain, numbing it just slightly. However I didn't feel better, the panic settling in immediately at the remembrance, my chest aching tortuously at the memories that had been stirred.

"Please don't touch me..."

"You have a large bump on your head."

We both spoke at the same time as I pulled away and I carefully shook my head at him, warning him silently that it was something that I wasn't about to talk about. For some reason though he didn't back off like he normally would and he raised his hand back slowly to my head, resting it softly against the sore spot, cooling it... soothing it.

I didn't back away this time and as we sat there quietly, my face turned towards him, his hand wrapped around my head, touching the raised bump, I felt something shoot through my body. I felt myself reacting to his touch and his close proximity and it took all of my strength not to lean in and rest my head against his shoulder.

"Bella... will you let my father look at this?" my eyes had started to close and at his soft pleading they shot back open and looked up into his face, his expression pained as he continued to hold my head in his hand.

"There's no need for that. I'm fine." I insisted and forced myself to take a deep breath as the first students began to trickle in, the screeching sound of the bell following only moments later and causing me to wince in pain. As the rest of the class arrived and many of them paused midway down the aisle to stare at us, I became slightly uncomfortable at our position. But Edward's hand didn't budge from it's place soothing me. Even when I turned my head to face the front of the class and the teacher who had moved to the black board, and had begun to write out the instructions for the day's lab it stayed there, shifting as I did.

He didn't say anything else and once we had started to complete the assignment his hand finally moved away from the bump on my head, a strange emptiness coming over me, something inside of me missing the close, physical contact.

We didn't speak any more after that, completing the lab in silence. But for some reason the silence almost seemed more intimate and I felt myself leaning in towards him constantly, the urge to have him touch me warring with what I knew couldn't happen. With what I knew that I would never let happen.

"Do you want to walk with me to the gym Bella?" Class was nearly finished and at the sound of Mike's voice in the background I jumped, whipping my head around to see him leaning against the table across from us, a smug expression filling his features as he glanced past me, presumably to Edward.

"Um... that's nice of you Mike, but I've got to go to my locker first and..." I tried to think of anything else but the truth was that I just didn't want to walk with him. He had been the one and only persistent student in the school who couldn't seem to take no for an answer. It didn't help that he seemed to think that just because we were forced to work together all day each weekend, that we were best friends or even something more than that.

His face fell and an awkward kind of moment passed before I felt an icy hand in my own, an electrifying tingle jolting me at the contact. I watched as Mike's eyes drifted down, catching our entwined fingers and then looking back up at my face, surprise evident on his own.

"Um... well... yeah..." he stuttered nervously and then spun around on his heel, giving up and crossing the room, returning to his table quickly and gathering his books just in time for the bell to sound.

Once I was sure he was gone I ripped my hand out of Edward's and turned around to glare at him.

"What was that about?" I hissed between my teeth as I angrily shoved my binder into my backpack and grabbed the stack of papers to hand to the teacher. While I was hopeful that our hand-holding had finally deterred Mike enough that he would finally give up chasing after me, I was also angry at Edward, at the possessive nature of his actions.

He didn't answer me, instead cleaning up his own books and standing up, turning towards the door and then suddenly hesitating. In the time he stood still I also rose up out of my chair, moving too quickly for my head to catch up to the movement, stumbling forward as the room circled around me. I closed my eyes to try and steady myself, my arm reaching out to grab something solid to hold onto, finding only a freezing cold stone, gripping it to prevent myself from falling down completely.

"Bella," he began and I felt his arms shift me, wrapping around my shoulders and steadying me.

"Ms. Swan? Mr. Cullen?" I groaned internally at the sound of Mr. Banner's voice, filled with concern and approaching us. "Is everything all right?" Edward's other hand was holding me gently at the shoulder, my body leaning against his arm as he held me up.

"I... I'm..." I tried to open my eyes to assure him that I was fine, but the room began to spin again the instant that the light met them and I felt my body begin to sway, Edward's arm tightening just slightly around my body to support it.

"Bella wasn't feeling well this morning and skipped lunch, she's feeling a little bit faint now." Edward's voice was smooth as he spoke and for once I was glad that he was a vampire, knowing that whatever story he decided to spin would be believable, it was easy to let him take over the conversation. "I'm going to take her down to the nurse's office and get her something to eat." his voice was so enchanting that for a moment even I believed him.

"Ms. Swan?" I felt his eyes on me and could do nothing more than nod my head in agreement at Edward's statement, my head thumping loudly, drowning out nearly every other sound in the room.

Mr. Banner must have given Edward the go-ahead as a few seconds later he was pulling me gently, trying to get me to move. But the movement was dizzying, even with my eyes closed I felt like I was falling down a dark hole, spinning around and around the entire way to the bottom.

"That's it Bella, I'm taking you to my father." his words were whispered harshly in my ear and I felt him lift me just barely, my feet no longer touching the ground as he walked us outside, the sounds and smells changing as the cold air hit my face.

I attempted to open my eyes as we crossed the parking lot, but the dizziness only continued to get worse, my knees weakening as I fought to stay conscious. A minute later Edward was shifting me, maintaining his hold but picking me up and setting me down on the seat of a vehicle, my body flimsy as I continued to struggle against the pain and wooziness.

Edward got in the car and I heard it start softly, the purr of the engine working like a lullaby as the darkness washed over me and I began to lose the battle against my tiredness. But I didn't fall completely asleep, the sounds of the car still barely audible to my ears, the unusual but comforting feeling of Edward's hand resting on top of mine still floating within my brain.

"We're here Bella," I was drifting on the verge of consciousness when his velvety tone pierced the silence, followed quickly after by the feeling of his arms surrounding me as he picked me up and we began to walk through the misting rain.

"Edward? What are you doing home?" It was like Deja Vu when I heard Esme's distinctly feminine voice and I began to fight my mind, to try to bring myself back to awareness. "What's happened Edward... did you..."

"I didn't hurt her." Edward's voice wasn't angry, but saddened all the same and I wondered why he had brought me to his house. I had been trying not to think about it, to think about the way that Charlie would react, but I had also just assumed that he was taking me to the hospital.

"Where's Carlisle?" His stone embrace still held me and I felt my body curling in tighter to him, reacting embarrassingly on it's own accord.

"What is it Edward?"

The room fell silent and I could only guess that they were talking beyond my senses. Edward never let me go though and I only briefly felt it when he shifted me to more of an upright position in his arms and the probing fingers that pressed agonizingly against my head.

"There's most likely severe swelling, she needs a CT scan... you should have taken her directly to the hospital Edward." It was the first thing I heard and I tried once again to open my eyes, not quite managing to complete the task.

"No hospital..." My words were slurred but I was hopeful that they were able to understand them, that they would respect my request.

"Bella, can you open your eyes and look at me?" Edward shifted me again as Carlisle spoke and I felt the softness of wherever he had sat us down, his arm still holding onto my waist securely. Trying again I forced my heavy lids up, grateful for the dim lighting in the room.

I managed to keep my eyes open while Carlisle took his penlight and checked my pupils, but beyond that I couldn't help it and they slammed shut again, my body slumping further into Edward's side.

"Bella..."

"No hospital..." The words were slightly less slurred this time and I heard Carlisle release a quiet sigh.

"Why don't I take Bella upstairs Edward?" I wasn't expecting Esme's voice to cut in again and her thin arms replaced Edward's thick ones as she easily picked me up from the sofa.

She didn't say anything else as she carried me upstairs and laid me down on what I assumed was a bed, the sound of the door closing and heavy curtains being drawn making me feel obtrusive. Using my legs to push myself up I summoned what little energy I had and leaned against the wooden headboard, my eyes squinting just barely open in the darkness.

"You need to rest for a little while Bella so I think you should lay back down." Her words were soft and her eyes pleading but there was something firm in her tone that told me it was useless to argue with her. However I refused to adjust my position, still somewhat sitting up on the bed as I took in the room around me, the dark wood furniture, the deep burgundy accents.

As I continued to look anywhere but at her face – at her caring eyes – she sat down on the edge of the bed, close enough that I could see her through my blurred vision but far enough away that it wasn't too uncomfortable, at least until she spoke again.

"Bella, I think it's time that you and I had a bit of a heart-to-heart."

**A/N: A couple things I want to mention. I've changed the Edward a little bit in this story. He still struggles with things but I want him to be a little less self-hating than in SM's twilight. Also Bella has issues and is stubborn for reasons which I promise will be revealed in time. :) Hope you enjoyed this chapter! Please R& R!**

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	8. Chapter 7: Broken Fingers, Broken Body

_**As I continued to look anywhere but at her face – at her caring eyes – she sat down on the edge of the bed, close enough that I could see her through my blurred vision but far enough away that it wasn't too uncomfortable, at least until she spoke again. **_

"_**Bella, I think it's time that you and I had a bit of a heart-to-heart."**_

I was expecting Esme to treat me the same way that Carlisle and Edward had both been treating me, her heart shaped face pleading with me to go to the hospital.

But what I didn't expect was the firm tone she spoke to me with, the harsh words that she directed towards me.

"I don't know what kind of life you've lived before now Bella." I winced at her words, the reminder of my past not something that I wanted to think about through the pounding in my skull. "To be honest, at this moment none of that matters." I was a little bit surprised by the way that she was speaking, having expected her to try and pry information out of me the way that Alice had previously done.

"What I am curious about Bella... is what you expect your future to look like, how long exactly do you plan to live like this... to live at all?" Her heart shaped face was smooth as she said the words and I tried to ignore her question, my eyes closing to rest a moment, the blurriness making me even more tired than I had previously been.

When I didn't answer her she sighed and continued. "Bella. Answer me, how long do you plan to live like this?" She reminded me of one of the mother's that you see on television programs, disciplining their children until they understood what they had done wrong. And for some reason, the way that she was treating me didn't anger me, it only convinced me further of her concern for my well-being.

"Another few months or so... until I can get away from him and get away from this... from vampires... from everything." It was still a struggle to speak clearly and I was constantly fighting the fog that wanted to overwhelm me. I felt my body leaning further and further to the side, the little strength that I had been able to summon quickly waning.

"Bella... if you keep going like this you aren't going to make it out of your father's house." Her words hit me with a force I hadn't been expecting, her implications clear as I sought out something else to say, some argument to prove her wrong. But she wasn't wrong and the truth was that I didn't care if I lived to get out of his house. I didn't believe that I had a future.

"I don't have a choice." My stubborn words came out more clearly than the previous words that I had spoken and I was thankful for that as I squeezed my eyes shut against the spinning room, a single tear trickling softly down my cheek as I did so.

"You do have a choice though Bella, let us help you." Her voice had softened considerably and I felt more tears begin to flow from my eyes, my body slumping the rest of the way over on the bed.

"I can't. I have to stay with Charlie." I argued, my speech slurring again as I began to give in to the tiredness, to the fog. "You don't understand..." I trailed off as I could barely understand what I was saying myself now.

"Look at me Bella," I tried to open my eyes to look at her, to focus on her stern words... but my eyes were heavy and my mind was beginning to fade.

"You have two choices Bella and I don't believe you will be happy with either one, but you do need to pick," she began and I pulled myself through the fog, my eyes bursting open and then closed again as I tried to focus on her. "We can take you to the hospital and Carlisle can look at you, take you for the tests that you need and keep Charlie away at least while you're there. Or we can take you to the hospital and have another doctor assigned to your case." I felt myself shudder at the second option, knowing that most doctors wouldn't keep quiet about the marks on my body, the bruises in the shape of hand-prints or the cuts and burns that adorned my arms and legs. I couldn't let that happen.

"Carlisle..." I whispered his name, my slurred speech not completely clear but obviously clear enough as moments later I heard the door to the room squeak open and their hushed voices speaking quietly. I didn't try and listen to them though, the darkness fully taking over and engulfing my body, a strange cooling sensation filling me as it did. The last thing that pierced my consciousness being Carlisle's voice_, _the words still not quite clear to me.

This time I didn't regain any sense of consciousness as they transported me, my mind blank and filled only with darkness until my awareness gradually began to come back to me, the annoying sounds of the hospital the first thing that hit my ears.

The second thing was the sound of Charlie's gruff voice, arguing with someone from close by.

"She's my daughter and I have a right to see her, to make sure she's alright!" His voice wasn't quiet and I felt my body coil up, my knees automatically attempting to move to my chest at the sound, at the reminder of where I was and what had happened.

There was an unfamiliar voice that argued back with him, informing him of Dr. Cullen's specific orders that I was to have absolutely no visitors. I breathed a sigh of relief until I heard a large crash and the sound of Charlie's voice calling my name as he moved further into the room, closer to where I was laying on the uncomfortable bed.

"Isabella, are you alright?" His voice was dripping with a phony concern and I felt my body cringe away from him just as his hand latched onto my own, squeezing it tightly and causing me to moan softly in pain.

"Chief Swan," Dr. Cullen's voice was smooth and calm but I could just barely detect a hint of anger underneath his words.

"Dr. Cullen, what's wrong with Isabella?" The false note of concern in Charlie's voice made me feel nauseous and as his hand squeezed mine even tighter I began to lose feeling in my fingertips.

"Chief Swan, your daughter arrived here several hours ago with a severe head injury. Perhaps we should discuss this down the hall in private." Carlisle's tone was firm in his suggestion but it only caused Charlie to increase the pressure on my hand until I felt the crunch of one of my fingers, the pain shooting through my arm and causing me to yelp in pain.

"I'd like to take my daughter home now." Charlie was insistent and I could hear his own anger seeping through his words, my hand was now completely numb aside from the pain in my ring finger.

Finally forcing my eyes open I was surprised by Charlie's close proximity and the way that he was positioned, preventing me from seeing Carlisle's face. Shifting my head to the side I finally caught Carlisle's eye and tried to plead with him silently to help me, knowing that any verbal sounds that I made would be punishable later.

"I'm afraid I'm going to have to ask you to leave the room with me, one final time." His voice had turned cold as he stared down my father, a shiver running down my spine at the menacing look he was giving him. But still my father didn't back down, maintaining his grip on my hand and staring right back at Carlisle, his free hand moving to rest threateningly on his gun holster.

Carlisle didn't back down either though, turning his head then and nodding at towards the door. Immediately two security guards approached on either side of my father, both of them giving him a pointed look.

Finally he gave in with a loud _humph_ and twisted around angrily, threatening Carlisle with lawsuits and fines when he came back later. He didn't have to threaten me verbally, his glare telling me everything that I needed to know about the punishments I would receive once he had me alone. I felt myself shiver as I heard his boots stomp out the door and down the hall, another loud crash sounding as he continued on.

"Damn it." I turned back to Carlisle who had picked up my quickly swelling hand and was carefully turning it over. "I'm so sorry Bella," he apologized to me and I tried to hold in the tears that were threatening to fall again. "I'm going to have to call down to x-ray and get you back down there to have this looked at, it looks like he broke at least two of your fingers just now." he glanced towards the door and I lifted my other hand, signaling for him to go ahead.

He didn't go though, instead pulling a chair over to the bed from beside the wall, his expression neutral as he sat down beside me, taking my uninjured hand in his and holding his fingers to my wrist.

"How are you feeling now Bella?" he asked once he had taken my pulse and put my hand back down, checking the IV line and then watching me, his golden eyes staring into my own brown ones as he waited for my reply.

"I feel... slow..." I answered him carefully, wondering if my words even made sense. "For example when I turn my head like this, I see the different parts of the room but I'm already looking at the next part by the time my brain processes what it has seen." I answered carefully and he nodded his head for me to continue. "Everything is still kind of foggy, my head hurts and my throat is dry... I'm still really tired, and my hand is killing me now too." I finished speaking and bit down on my lower lip, afraid that somehow I had said too much.

"Can you tell me your full name?" he asked gently and I did so, answering the rest of his simple questions without any issues.

After several more cognitive and motor-skills tests he left the room, a nurse coming in almost immediately afterwards with an ice pack for my hand. The next time that he came back Edward was with him and it took me a minute to control the smile that began to creep across my face at the sight of him, at his hands combing through his unruly hair in worry.

"A nurse should be coming in shortly to wheel you down to get your hand x-rayed," Carlisle spoke softly and I saw him turn slightly, as though listening to some sounds that I couldn't quite hear, his brow furrowing as he did so.

"What is it?" I blurted my question out before I could stop myself, the uneasy feeling in the pit of my stomach signaling me that whatever it was that was bothering him, it had to do with Charlie.

"It seems that your father is causing quite the stir within our legal department downstairs." he answered me cautiously. "Don't worry about that though Bella, we won't allow him to come anywhere near you again while you're here." Turning, he shot Edward a pointed look before he left, moving quickly back out into the hallway.

"Is it alright if I come in?" Edward looked uncomfortable standing alone in the middle of my room and I gave him a weak smile, his face relaxing slightly as he moved to the chair that Carlisle had previously occupied.

Closing my eyes I tried to relax a little bit, the thumping in my head still making it difficult to focus on my surroundings. My worry about the Cullens not being able to protect me from Charlie - even while I was here in the hospital - causing my heart to pound in fear.

"I can't let you go back to your father's house Bella," I wanted to open my eyes and see if he was serious but when I tried to do so, I got nauseous and instead rolled to my side, keeping my eyes closed tightly and fighting the urge to be sick.

"We can't sit by and let him hurt you any longer," Edward's voice was quieter when he spoke this time and I felt my defenses going up as he sat there, telling me that I had no choice in the situation.

"Whether or not I return to Charlie's house is not your decision." I snapped quietly but firmly. I heard the screech of the chair as it was pushed back from the bed, the metal legs scraping across the floor loudly. I thought that he was leaving the room, leaving me to myself but I was wrong.

"Do you understand what happened today Bella?" I was surprised by the anger in his voice and I peeked through my barely opened eye-lids to see him pacing the floor in front of me, one hand gripping a handful of his hair, the other clenched into a fist at his side. He didn't wait for me to answer him before answering his own question. "I don't know the details Bella, but I do know that Charlie hurt you. At the school I suspected it was a concussion but you are so aggravatingly stubborn that I let it go, figuring that if you could make it through Biology then you would probably be okay. But you weren't Bella, I wanted to bring you here directly but you kept muttering _'no hospital', _so against my better judgment I didn't bring you here. I took you to my place and had my father look at you. It was obvious that your head injury was more severe but you can be so... so... bullheaded!" He took a break in his rant, his pacing also coming to a halt as he turned to look at me.

"Like I said Bella, I don't know what happened because you won't tell us... but you scared the hell out of all of us when you started seizing before we could move you. Since we brought you in you've had two more seizures and your CT scan only confirmed the massive swelling in your brain. You don't realize how lucky you are Bella, how amazing it is that you are here right now, that you can talk and move and think." I was feeling overwhelmed by his words, by the fierce sense of protection that seemed to be rolling off of him. Tears were running down my cheeks as he stood there watching me, and I was unsure of what to say back to him.

"Why do you even care?" It was the only thing that I could think of in the moment and for an instant I watched as Edward's face took on a pained expression.

"I feel... I can't explain it Bella... but I feel very protective of you, and I... we... just want to help you." He rubbed his hands across his face before he cautiously came forward again, sitting back down in the chair.

"He saw Alice walking with me across the school parking lot yesterday." I don't know why I began to tell him this, the words bursting out of me, unable to be suppressed for any longer. "He was so angry I don't even remember how, but I ended up on the floor by the front door and before I knew it he was dragging me by my feet up the stairs... then... he..." my mouth was suddenly dry and it felt as though it was swollen. Suddenly I couldn't speak any longer, I couldn't open my mouth, my entire body becoming overwhelmed with a pins-and-needles feeling before numbing entirely.

"Bella?" His voice was distant and the last thing that I heard before I blacked out again.

**A/N: Yes Bella is as stubborn as ever and it can be quite frustrating for those who care about her. So... what's going to happen to Bella now... next several chapters are written and just in editing stage so I should be able to post this a little more frequently. Please R& R if you enjoyed this chapter!**

**** I also want to note that I am in no way a medical professional so while I know that some of the information in my stories may be a little un-realistic... it is fiction, and sometimes it just has to be that way to fit the story :) **

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	9. Chapter 8: Maternal Care

"_**Bella?" His voice was distant and the last thing that I heard before I blacked out again.**_

"Bella?" My neck was stiff as I rolled my head to the side and looked to the gentle voice coming from the door to my room. Esme stayed there silently watching me as I wondered why she was here, what she wanted.

"I was wondering if it was alright if I come in for a few minutes?" her face was filled with a nervous expression that was much different from the stern maternal one I had last seen on her face. I nodded my head awkwardly at her and watched as she came closer to the bed, not sitting on the lone chair, but standing across from me so that I could see her.

"Are you feeling any better dear?" I didn't answer verbally yet, instead turning my head from side to side in a negative response. After a few minutes of uncomfortable silence I decided to elaborate. "I'm really tired... and stiff. Everything hurts." the words sounded slightly muffled thanks to my tongue which was still swollen from where I had bitten it.

"From what Carlisle has told me, that sounds pretty normal following a seizure." Esme spoke softly and I bit down on my bottom lip to try and hold in my sobs. Ever since waking back up surrounded by Carlisle and a handful of nurses I had been fighting the urge to cry, a desolate feeling taking over my body and darkening my mood further.

I was beginning to get sleepy again as we stayed awkwardly quiet, my eyes fighting the urge to fall back asleep. Aside from the tiredness though I was feeling better than before I had blacked out, my head no longer pounding excruciatingly, now it was only a dull thudding in the background.

"Do you know when can I get out of here and go home?" I didn't really know what else to say to the strange women standing across from me but once the words were out I regretted them, her face filling with a genuine sadness as I spoke. But I was worried about what Charlie was going to do now. I hadn't seen or heard anything from him since waking back up and that scared me, I had to get back home before he called Renee and told her about my disobedience.

"You need to stay here until the swelling goes down and they've ensured that there is no permanent damage Bella," She looked almost haunted as she spoke to me and I briefly allowed my mind to wander, questions about who this unique vampire was surfacing in my head.

"Why are you still here?" It was the most obvious question that I could ask and while she looked slightly saddened by what I said, she didn't seem offended at all. "Why do you all even care?" I couldn't control the words as they popped out. Maybe it was a side effect of my brain trauma or maybe my curiosity really was that strong but I felt that for some reason I needed to know.

Instead of answering me, she looked at me with venom filled eyes and asked me a question in return, "Do you mind if I tell you a little bit about myself?" I was surprised and intrigued so as I shifted to a more comfortable position on the bed I gave her a soft _'okay' _in reply.

"Well, to start, my name is Esme Cullen and Carlisle changed me into this," she gestured to herself as she spoke and I was a little curious about her acceptance of what she was. "in 1921." she paused and I waited for her to continue. Her age didn't bother me, he had been much older than she was.

When I didn't react to the beginning of her story she continued, "We had actually met years previous while I was still a human but the pull once I was changed was indescribable... it was obvious we were meant for each other." While I wasn't upset with her for telling me this, I was slightly confused as to where she was going with her words until she spoke again.

"Before that though I was a human, and while I had dreams of becoming a teacher... instead I listened to my parents who had been attempting to set up an arranged marriage with a man who at the time seemed decent." A knot filled my stomach and I began to feel nauseous as I sensed where she was going with her story.

"Charles was wonderful while he courted me but the night that we wed, everything changed. He was abusive in more ways than one and I lived with it for years, the only peace that I got was the short time that he left to war. At first I attempted to reach out, to get assistance from my friends, my parents. They only insisted that I keep quiet, that it wasn't that bad and I just had to get used to it. When Charles returned from the war and found out I had been talking about the abuse and attempting to get help, it got worse. He broke bones, I had many concussions, I was constantly bruised... the worst part though were the things that he spoke of, the threats that he made. I had a younger cousin that I was very close to and she idolized me. He used to use that against me though, threatening to kill me and to marry her next if I spoke up again, if I continued to disappoint him." Her voice was thick as she swallowed, all of her actions looking so human as she opened up her past to me, the only thing missing being the tears that stayed trapped in her eyes.

"How did you get away from him? Did he ever hurt your cousin?" I asked softly, genuinely curious about what her answer would be.

"It was when I found out I was pregnant that I knew that I had to do something. I knew that I couldn't rely on my parents for help so instead I ran to my cousins and my Aunt. It was a risk to do so, but they were different than my parents and I found out that my Aunt had at one time had a very similar experience to mine before she met my Uncle. They were sympathetic and allowed me to stay with them, but when Charles figured out where I had gone I left, knowing now that my Aunt and Uncle would never allow Eloise to suffer at his hands. I posed as a war-widow while I was pregnant and began to teach finally." She paused her story and I watched her blink rapidly, her hand raising up to wipe invisible tears from her face. As for me I was completely engulfed in her her story, my tiredness still threatening to drown me, but my interest keeping me awake.

"William was born a beautiful, perfectly healthy baby boy. But he quickly became sick, dying only two days after his birth of a lung fever." Now I was the one blinking back tears and choking back sobs, her story pulling at my heart in more ways than one. "After his death I gave up living and I jumped from a cliff, attempting to end things. That is when Carlisle found me. He remembered treating me as a teenager and made his decision to change me." She was smiling a sad smile and I wanted to reach out and embrace her, but I kept still, my heart aching for the things that we had both suffered.

"Are you alright dear?" Esme stepped closer to the bed, the look on her face cautious as she approached me. I was curled up on the middle of the bed, the tears streaming down my cheeks as I pictured Esme as a human, her soft features, her warm face.

"What happened to Charles?" I sniffled softly and tried to regain control of my sobbing as I asked her the question, the similarities too much as I nearly choked on his name.

"He attempted to chase after my cousin but was unsuccessful. It caused a rift among my family but I found out a few years later that they had all reconciled. Charles drank himself to death soon after my cousin's rejection."

"I still don't have a choice. Charlie has more ways... he'll destroy me... him..." I was blubbering away, my eyes blurry and I felt the bed dip beside me as Esme sat down, her hand stroking my back gently.

"Tell me what is holding you to him Bella, let us help you. What is his threat?" Her words were pleading and as I laid there with tears rolling down my cheeks I considered her offer. Could they really help me? Could they protect me... protect him?

"I can't. I'm sorry." I apologized softly and she sighed, still rubbing my back gently.

I felt myself beginning to doze off, the tears and stress causing the tired feeling to magnify. Just before I was pulled completely under I heard Esme begin to speak quietly. "I'll let you get some sleep Bella, but if you need anything..."

"No." My eyes darted open as the bed began to shift and I reached out, grabbing her ice cold hand with my casted one, something that any other day would have been awkward and uncomfortable. But I didn't care, I somehow felt safe with her there with me, even if I did know it was only temporary. "Would you... I mean... could you stay a while?" Her face relaxed at my stuttering and she sat back down without saying a word, her hand returning to rub my back again, her other hand staying locked in mine.

It felt strange to be sitting like this, with a vampire by my side comforting me. But selfishly I clung to her, not willing to feel abandoned by this woman, this strong and caring person who showed me more maternal concern then any of my parental figures ever had.

Esme stayed with me the entire time that I slept, through the dark dreams that tortured me, causing me to jolt upright in the bed. I slept well into the next day, occasionally sensing the presence of others in the room, pieces of hushed conversations reaching my ears as I floated between heavy slumber and light tossing.

By the time I woke up late the next day I was feeling quite a bit better and I was amazed that Esme was still in the room with me, only now she was sitting in the chair beside the bed, a large novel in her hands.

I was about to speak up, to thank her for staying when I heard a familiar voice in the doorway and it sent chills down my spine.

"Let's go Isabella, I'm taking you home now." I wanted to scream at him, to argue and yell and throw a tantrum but I was frozen on the bed in fear as he stormed further into the room, gripping the blankets and yanking them off of me roughly.

"Chief Swan..."

"You stay out of this." He turned and glared at Esme before reaching back around to me and grabbing my sore wrist, yanking me out of the bed and causing my IV line to pull out from my hand. "I have papers here that state that Isabella can come home with me and you all can't stop us." I was gripping my hand, trying to cover the blood that was pouring out from where the IV had been, while at the same time trying to steady myself as I swayed back and forth.

"Carlisle?" Esme's face was horror-stricken as she turned towards the door and while Charlie handed me my pants and shirt from the previous day I watched as Carlisle shook his head and a woman in a pant suit stood next to him, eying the situation warily.

I couldn't do anything but stare at them all in terror as Charlie held me roughly by the arm and I tried to understand how they could let this happen after all of their promises to keep me safe from him.

"Get dressed, we're going home." Charlie spun me by the arm towards the bathroom but he must have misjudged how weak I really was and I went flying into the wall instead, my body taking most of the force before my forehead hit the wall and I crumpled to the floor in shock.

"You are not taking Bella anywhere, that is the second act of abuse I have witnessed from you and I will not allow you take her out of this hospital. I don't care what paperwork your lawyers have managed to conjure up." Carlisle's voice sounded downright angry as he leaned over me and pulled out his penlight, immediately beginning to look me over for new injuries and checking my head for further damage.

"Judge said it's my right to take her. I'm her father." I didn't dare to try and look at him, to try and see the angry flash in his eyes. Curling up on my side my head was starting to pound again and my wrist was aching from where I had tried to stop myself from hitting the wall.

"Things have just changed now Mr. Swan, it was not the wisest action to take with all of us in the room." I assumed that it was the woman in the pant suit speaking and I closed my eyes, sensing that she had some sort of authority. I didn't know whether to be relieved or upset.

It took a number of security guards and three phone calls before Charlie was once again escorted out of my room, and I learned that the woman in the pant suit was the hospital's lawyer. Once they were all cleared out and it was only Carlisle and Esme left I noticed the dampness on my leg and the way my hospital gown suddenly felt chilly.

"I think... I think I had an accident." It was the first thing that I had said and as embarrassing as it was to say out loud, it wasn't nearly as embarrassing as the entire incident with Charlie had been.

"Let's get you up and cleaned up, stay here while I get a nurse to help you in the washroom." Carlisle was about to stand up when I shook my head, "Can... can Esme take me to the bathroom?" I felt somewhat attached to the gentle woman for some reason and the idea of going anywhere, even the washroom without her with me was frightening.

Esme was kind and considerate as she patiently walked me to the bathroom, helping me out of the soiled gown and underwear and into clean ones that a nurse had brought for me. When I was finished she helped support me as we returned to my room and I climbed up onto the bed, pulling the blankets up to my chin and shivering.

"Do you think you can really help me?" I wasn't sure why I was even considering it but after seeing Charlie I realized just how worn out I actually was, realized that I couldn't take any more of it. I was tired.

"Yes Bella, we can help you if you trust us." she smiled warmly at me and I felt safer again, protected with this strange vampire next to me. "Why don't you start by telling me what Charlie is threatening you with?"

"My son. I can't let him get my son."

**A/N: Ah yes, Bella has many layers and this is just one small revelation about our stubborn star character. Anybody have any ideas on what's going to happen next? I tried to branch out a little more for this story and use some different ideas I hope you like them... next several chapters are written and just in editing stage so I should be able to post this a little more frequently. Please R& R if you enjoyed this chapter! Oh and I also tried to use some of Esme's actual story just adding my own details to make it fit in this story.**

**** I also want to note that I am in no way a medical professional so while I know that some of the information in my stories may be a little un-realistic... it is fiction, and sometimes it just has to be that way to fit the story :) **

**** All Twilight References are the property of Stephenie Meyer. I've just borrowed them to spend time playing around with them.**


	10. Chapter 9: Tangled Truths

"_**My son. I can't let him get my son." **_

"Your son Bella?" Esme couldn't quite hide her surprise at my words and I tried to fight back my tears, to remain strong enough that I could tell this woman enough that she could help him. I nodded my head and began to pick nervously at the blanket, unsure of whether or not I would actually be able to speak the words, to share with another person what had happened.

I didn't know if she expected me to just speak up but I didn't know how to start, so I sat there quietly and waited for her to recover her surprise, to ask me a question, to say anything at all. During the silence Carlisle joined us in my room, hesitating only for a second before he approached the bed taking my vitals again before backing up and standing next to his wife.

"Before you say anything else Bella I need you to tell us where he is now, is he safe? Does Charlie have access to him?" I didn't know how to answer the questions, first nodding and then shaking my head negatively. I didn't know what Charlie had access to, it was possible he had already contacted Renee and started the process.

"He should be safe. As far as I know he's still in Phoenix, I don't know what Charlie has access to... he says that he knows people... and... and Phil..." I was beginning to sob again and I swallowed thickly, reaching to the table beside me for a tissue for my nose.

"Who is he with Bella?" Carlisle's voice cut in then, calm and patient but also firm.

"Laura and John Reynolds." I swallowed again thinking about him, "They are his grandparents."

"What's his name?" Esme asked softly and I saw Carlisle reach into his pocket for his phone, typing something quickly and then looking back to me.

"Cole Weston Reynolds." Carlisle was typing on his phone again and Esme was trying to smile reassuringly at me but it wasn't working. I could feel my body beginning to shake at the memories of everything that had happened in Phoenix, at the humiliating way that Cole had been brought into the world.

"I'm just going to go make a quick phone call and I'll be right outside your door if you need anything Bella," Carlisle left the room, quietly closing the door behind him and Esme turned back to me.

"Can you tell me anything else Bella, anything that we can use to help you? How old is Cole? Do his grandparents have legal custody of him? Where is his father? Why would Charlie want him?" She asked the questions slowly but I felt like I couldn't answer them. I had become so accustomed to pretending that Phoenix never happened, that none of it was real.

"Oh Bella! I'm sorry." She moved closer to me and helped me sit up when I started to cry harder, my sobs loud and pained as the memories cut through my heart.

"He's only a baby. He's only eight months old... I signed custody of him over to Laura, it was... the safest... place... for him..." I choked out the words, my throat constricting even tighter as I thought about those first few days, thought about the ache that never left my chest.

I physically couldn't say anything else, and as the tears dried up and my sobs eventually died down, Esme stayed right there with me, rocking me gently as she held onto me, doing the very thing I had always wished my own mother would do.

Carlisle didn't come back into the room for some time and even when he did, neither of them asked me any more questions, probably sensing that I couldn't say anything more at the time. Even saying Cole's name had been agonizing for me. Instead he informed me that Jasper was taking care of things in Arizona, making sure that Cole was where he was supposed to be and that Charlie wasn't making any attempts to get to him. I didn't ask him any questions about how they did it, only prayed that it worked, that Charlie would not be able to get anywhere near him.

"How's she doing?" I was floating on the border between conscious and dreaming when the voice hit me and I instantly recognized the velvety tone, my body seeming to instantly calm down at the knowledge of his presence in the room with me.

"She's been sleeping off and on... and she's been having nightmares." Esme's whispered voice replied.

"Alice said that you need to go home for a while for appearances... and to hunt?" Edward asked softly and I heard a light squeak as Esme stood up from the chair.

"Yes, Carlisle says the nursing staff is getting suspicious... and I do need to hunt. It was difficult earlier when Ch... when _he_ pulled out her IV line." I felt bad for not noticing earlier, it must have been difficult for Esme to have my fresh blood in the room with her. As I thought about it I began to feel a strange warmth travel through me, a new sense of worth. She must have really been concerned to be able to act normally and not even show her thirst.

"Meet Carlisle in his office, he needs to hunt as well and if he doesn't leave it will start raising questions. Edward and I will stay here with her." I was slightly surprised to hear the tiny vampire's voice but the only thing that seemed to bother me was the way that I still sensed something more to the way that she spoke.

"Are you sure you're okay here Edward?" Esme seemed hesitant to leave and I wondered why it seemed to be more difficult for Edward then the rest of them.

"I'm fine... I hunted earlier and Alice is here if it gets to be too much I'll leave the room." It sounded like he was making some sort of promise to the small woman.

The room quieted down after that, the only other sound I heard being the gentle click as the door was closed, the sound of plastic shifting as someone sat in the chair across from where I was laying on the bed, still half asleep.

"_Mommy! I'm hungry!" I hadn't eaten breakfast or lunch and the sun was setting, my bedtime closing in as my tiny stomach rumbled hungrily. She had been occupied with one of her many hobbies and had told me repeatedly through the day to 'go play', she would get me something to eat in a little while. _

"_Stop whining Bella!" she snapped at me and I watched as she cranked up the volume on the CD player, tuning me out. My lip trembled as my stomach grumbled again._

_Crying softly I made my way into the kitchen and decided to make myself a sandwich. Pushing the wooden chair to the counter I carefully climbed up and took the bread out of the cupboard, reaching on my tip-toes to grab the peanut butter from the next shelf. But as I gripped it, my foot slipped, sending my screaming four year old body to the floor and landing awkwardly on my arm. _

"_Damn it Bella!" I was crying hard by this point, my arm in agony as she ripped me up from the floor and looked at me._

"_I don't know what happened, I ran to get something from the other room and wasn't gone more than three seconds when I heard her crying..." Renee's voice was far too innocent and I was confused by her words as I sniffled quietly from the corner of the emergency room._

"_Just wait until your father hears about this Bella..." I shivered from the threat and pleaded with her not to tell him, knowing that if she did then the next time I saw him it would be far worse._

I bolted upright in the bed, my breathing heavy as I came out of the dream which was more like a memory. My arm was aching and as I went to rub it I felt the hard cast that covered my hand and the cracked bones from where Charlie had practically crushed it. The memories of the previous two days assaulted me and I began to panic, looking around the room in fear, my eyes widening when I saw the surprised faces of the two vampires in the room with me.

"Do you want to talk about your dream Bella?" Alice's voice squeaked out and I quickly shook my head at her, not knowing how much I had already said in my sleep.

It was quiet as I waited for my heart to slow back down to normal, still glancing constantly around the room to make sure that Charlie hadn't magically appeared.

"Are you alright Bella?" Edward looked at me cautiously and moved to take a step towards the bed, Alice's hand darting out to grab him at the same time that I felt my body lean back away from him in fear. It was irrational and while I somehow knew that he wouldn't hurt me, my instincts had gone into overdrive thanks to my nightmares.

"I'm sorry, I didn't meant to frighten you." He apologized softly and then backed up towards the wall, his hand moving up and his fingers running through his copper coloured locks.

"You didn't... it's not you..." I stuttered slightly and regretted the way I had moved back, now suddenly wanting him closer to me again.

He didn't budge from his place at the wall and Alice remained silently seated in the chair. Eventually my eyes drifted closed again and I was pulled back into the tortured depths of my memories, which had become even more vivid and clear since my arrival in the hospital. My dreams had shifted this time though, no longer was I a young child, no... now I was the one trying to protect the perfect little brown eyed baby boy.

By the time I woke up again, Esme was back and I was beginning to wonder if seeing Edward and Alice in the room had only been another one of my dreams, something that my mind had conjured up and tricked me into believing. But as I examined Esme closer I noticed that she had changed her clothes and her eyes were back to a light golden colour as opposed to the nearly black shade I had last seen.

Esme stayed with me for the entire day, helping me to get up and changed into some pajamas that she had apparently bought for me and then forcing me to eat from the food tray that had been brought up to my room.

When I asked what happened next I was given a variety of options and even more promises from Dr. and Mrs. Cullen regarding my safety and the safety of my son. As difficult as it was, I made a choice that I never would have previously made, a decision that I could only hope was the right one.

After lunch, with Carlisle and Esme sitting on one side of me and the hospital's lawyer sitting on the other side, I gave my official statement regarding the abuse I had suffered through Charlie to both a social worker from Child Protective Services and a detective from the Washington State Police.

To my surprise talking about the abuse almost seemed to give me some sense of relief. Even when they mentioned the possibility of sending me back to Phoenix, to Renee... I was able to remain somewhat calm, knowing that after I told them the rest of the story it probably wouldn't be much of an option.

"Now, from what Dr. and Mrs. Cullen have mentioned, there is concern for another child?" The woman from child protective services asked and suddenly I felt the weight of what I was about to reveal, what I was about to tell them.

"Why don't you start at the beginning Bella, tell us about what happened in Arizona." Esme's voice was gentle and patient and she shifted, taking my hand in her own and squeezing it gently.

"I was always an inconvenience to Renee, especially once she met Phil. When my mom first left Charlie she brought me along simply to piss him off and make him angry. But she never wanted me around which is why she still sent me here to visit him on school breaks and during the summertime." My heart was racing again and I wasn't sure if I could do this, but I also knew it was the only way to keep him safe.

I gave them all several examples of the negligence I had grown used to, the way that I had been my own parent and had been forced to take care of myself. I found myself skipping several of the next parts of the story, not wanting to go into detail about what had happened with Weston, not able to go into detail about what had happened with _him._

"Renee was angry when she found out I was pregnant and together she and Phil attempted to force me into an abortion..." I didn't go into the other details yet, not wanting to reveal the things that they had done to attempt to force it.

"Renee and Phil might have access to him. They aren't supposed to... but... Charlie... I don't know what to think anymore." I was frustrated with the conversation, knowing that nothing that I was saying made much sense yet.

"Why would Renee and Phil have access to the child?" The social worker asked calmly and continued to make notes on her yellow legal pad.

"Phil... is... is Weston's brother... his half-brother. Cole's uncle. Laura Reynolds is Phil's mother." I swallowed back the bile that had risen in my throat and continued. "If Renee has access then Charlie has access... he'll pay her off... do whatever it takes... that's why I ended up here in Forks. Charlie always gets what he wants." There was so much that I still had trouble understanding myself and I knew I was still not making much sense as I tried to speak clearly, to tell them what they needed to know.

The social worker continued to pummel me with questions about Cole, about my relationship with Weston and about Phil's relationship with Laura. I answered most of the questions without hesitation, giving them whatever information I could. I could only hope that Laura had kept her promise to keep Renee and Phil away from the baby, but my chest was aching just thinking about it, my stomach sick with the possibilities that my mind had conjured up.

"What happens next?" I whispered softly as Esme lead me down the hall and back towards my hospital room, her arm wrapped around my shoulder supportively.

"They will do their jobs Bella... they will keep both you and Cole safe." I knew that she was right, they had explained the process to me back in the room. I would be placed with a foster family until I turned eighteen – six months from now. With the allegations against Charlie, they assured me that no judge would grant him custody again, but I was cautious in believing their statement. Arizona child protective services would be contacted and a file would be started on Cole, an investigation into Phil's relationship with my son following. Esme and I had left Carlisle with the detective in the small meeting room, my file in his hands. He would be explaining my injuries and the abuse that he had personally witnessed from Charlie, and I knew that they were hoping to send Charlie to jail. I didn't know what to hope for.

"How long do you think it will take..."

I couldn't complete my sentence, the sound firing instantly as we rounded the corner. Even Esme didn't quite have enough time to react properly, her surprise evident as she pulled me back an instant too late. The stinging in my shoulder told me all I needed to know as I collapsed to my knees in pain, gripping the agonizing spot and crying out in pain.

There were voices talking all around me and soon I was surrounded by doctors and nurses. I tilted my head and looked to the side, searching for the one person that I had finally begun to trust again. Instead I only saw Charlie, laying face down on the ground, a security guard on top of him with his knee in Charlie's back as he placed the metal bracelets on his wrists.

"Bella, look at me." Carlisle's voice commanded but I couldn't take my eyes off of the site in front of me as the detective I had just met with hoisted Charlie angrily up by the handcuffs. The gun he had used was on the floor across from where they were now standing and I caught the pointed look that Charlie gave me, first glancing down at the weapon and then back at me, hatred in his eyes.

Carlisle's hands were cold against my cheeks as he turned my head gently back to look at him and I felt myself begin to let go, the tears that had been threatening to spill, rolling down my cheeks as I realized what had happened.

Charlie... my own father... had just tried to end my life in a hospital full of people.

**A/N: Okay, a bit of a longer chapter here. There's still so much more to poor Bella's story but obviously she couldn't speak about a lot of it in front of humans! I love this story and hope you all do as well. If you enjoyed it or even if you didn't I would love it if you would please leave a review!**

***Just a disclaimer here. I'm not a doctor or a lawyer or a social worker. I know there may be mistakes in this story but really I'm just writing it for fun and as much as I try to be accurate, things are going to slip through the odd time. **

**** I don't own anything Twilight. It all belongs to it's creator Stephenie Meyer who I am grateful allows us to play with her creations!**


	11. Chapter 10: Unknown Future

_**Charlie... my own father... had just tried to end my life in a hospital full of people.**_

"_Isabella!" his voice sent a chill down my spine as it echoed through the hallway and up into my bedroom. I knew instantly that I was going to be in even more trouble now. Jumping up and off of my bed I tripped running across the floor in my attempts to get downstairs quickly enough. _

_Of course I was still not quite fast enough. Charlie's boots were already stomping up the stairs, thundering as each step pounded the poor wooden floorboards._

"_I'm sorry Char... I mean Dad." I had just pushed myself up and was on my way towards the stairs, knowing that he was expecting his dinner to be out and waiting for him. "I... I fell asleep... I didn't mean... I'll get your dinner..." I had squeezed passed him, surprised when he had let me pass by and move down the steps. I was three stairs from the bottom when I felt it, hard against my back, sending me tumbling the rest of the way down, landing hard on the floor beside the door. _

"_I told you Isabella, that I expect my dinner to be waiting when I walk in that door." I was so tired but I tried to get up again, pushing myself up to my knees as I felt him approach me, not able to get all the way up again before my back was pressed down by his boot. "I'm sorry Charlie, it's ready, it's in the slow cooker. I just need to plate it." I was trying my hardest not to give him the satisfaction of seeing me cry as I spoke, but the cracking in my voice still managed to give away my fear._

_I was right to feel afraid as I heard him grunt and suddenly I was flipped over when he grabbed my ankle, dragging my body roughly as he backed up the stairs, my body unable to do anything as it thumped against each step. _

"_I was driving by the school today Isabella... saw you as you were getting out of your truck and what did I find?" I tried to think back to what it could have been that upset him so much but my mind was blank as each step caused my head to pound. "I found you walking with one of those damn Cullen kids that I warned you to stay away from." I was too sore to try and answer, to try and explain that it wasn't my fault, that Alice just kept hanging around me. _

_Charlie's grip slipped then and I felt my body fall, unable to do anything as I tumbled backwards down the stairs, twisting and rolling to the bottom, my body aching when it finally landed. _

"_I don't like those Cullens. Too nosy. And since I already warned you once to stay away from them... this time I think I need to teach you a lesson about respect and obedience." he huffed as he grabbed my ankles again and started back up the stairs._

_Charlie was heaving with the effort of dragging my body by the time we reached the top and I was surprised when he continued down the hall and into his room instead of turning into my own._

"_Get up," he grunted between breaths and dropped me to the floor in his room. Struggling through the dizziness to obey him I pushed myself up and tried to lean against the wall to keep myself upright, knowing that if I didn't it would only be even worse for me. _

"_I'll teach you not to go against my rules," he muttered once he had regained his breath and as he reached for me I instinctively cringed back... something that I should have known better than to do. _

_I didn't have time to apologize for my action, Charlie's anger bubbled over and his face turned crimson as he grabbed my arms and I felt the bruises beginning to form before he tossed me into the wall face first, twisting my arms roughly behind my back. _

_I felt the cold metal bracelets as they wrapped around my wrists so tightly I knew that if I had to wear them for long I would lose feeling in my hands. Once he had them in position he yanked me to him by the chain and I felt my body begin to fall, my footing slipping as he pulled me back down the hall and towards my own bedroom._

_I had no idea what he had planned as he pulled me along and I struggled to keep up. My imagination was running wild with ideas about what he would do, but I certainly wasn't expecting him to slip, for his body to fall sideways and pull me with him. And I definitely wasn't expecting him to let go, allowing my body to hit the banister, flipping over the top, sending me tumbling through the air, struggling against the handcuffs before I hit the hallway floor below._

"Bella, it's alright sweetheart, you're safe here." I jumped back from her touch as my eyes adjusted to the dim lighting of the hospital room. My hands were twisted together and I felt myself rubbing the spots where I could still feel the cold metal squeezing my wrists. My head was aching and my entire body was drenched in sweat as I shook my head, trying to move my dampened hair off of my forehead.

"Bella, I don't want to push you, but you know that I'm here if you want to talk about your dreams." This scene had become far too familiar over the past few days as I recovered from my many injuries in the hospital room, my current home. Since I had been shot in the shoulder I had been here, refusing to speak unless it was necessary, unable to open up to or trust anybody. It wasn't that I didn't want to though, it was just that for some reason I felt like I couldn't.

Ever since I had realized that Charlie had attempted to end my life in such a public way I had closed down, pulled away from the Cullens. I didn't want to, but I also didn't want to involve them any further... it wasn't safe for me to get so attached to them – to count on them. But they still stayed with me, keeping a protective watch over me each day, sitting with me and trying to get me to open up to them.

"Bella?" I looked up into her worried eyes and realized that I was still sitting stiffly up on the bed, my sore arm starting to ache as I woke up further and tried to shift back to a better position.

"I'm sorry," I whispered softly and pulled the thin blanket up over me, hissing slightly in pain as I jostled my shoulder. Esme moved to help me fix the covers and I smiled at her gratefully.

"Bella, you don't have to..."

"No, you don't have to stay here with me. I'm sorry that I've gotten your family involved in all of this." my voice was raw as I spoke and she looked at me in surprise as I said the words. It had been days since I had voluntarily spoken to any of the Cullens.

Without speaking again she sat down on the bed next to me and as she had so often during the previous days she began to hum a soft melody as she stroked my head and I felt my body beginning to relax, the nightmare beginning to fade in the early morning light.

But for some reason I couldn't fall back asleep, "Why are you still here with me?" She had barely left me since Charlie's last attack and the question had been plaguing me the longer that she stayed, the more that I struggled against myself to trust her.

"I know you don't understand it and you still don't trust it Bella, but we do care about you a great deal... all of us." Her words struck something within me and even though I couldn't explain it, I knew that she meant them because I was beginning to care about them as well.

"Is he still safe?" I hadn't dared to ask the question before now, terrified of what the answer might be. I had only heard the official answer from the social worker, the one that stated that he was safe and would be checked in on. I didn't trust it but I had been too chicken to ask for any further details and when Carlisle had attempted to talk to me about it or anything else, I had simply shut down.

"Yes Bella, he's safe. The Reynolds moved to Colorado just after Christmas. Nobody has attempted to contact them or to find them." I breathed a sigh of relief at her answer.

"I fell over the railing," It was the first time I told her anything about my dreams, about the incidents that had started everything. She didn't say anything as I continued to tell her about the incident that had landed me in the hospital and when I began to shake, to cry, she did nothing but comfort me.

"When it was time for Charlie to leave for work he came down and kicked me to wake me up... he took the handcuffs off and gave me the usual warnings before he left. I knew it was worse than any other head injury I've ever had but I couldn't skip school... that would have been even worse." Esme had her arms wrapped around me as I finished up and while at first glance she seemed sad, I could also see her anger underneath. I didn't say anything else after that and neither did she, but there was a new sense of understanding, of basic trust between us that hadn't been there before and I wondered what it would mean for my relationship with them.

The silence was calming as we sat through the early morning and although I was thankful to her for staying with me, I was also still unable to completely trust her. Continuously I flipped between gratitude for their family and confusion and worry over what and when things would change with them. I wondered if I was being stupid for even trusting them a small amount and whether or not it would finally kill me.

"How long until I can go ho... get out of here?" I asked Carlisle the next morning and like Esme he seemed surprised to hear me initiate a conversation with him.

"Medically... you can leave any time as long as there is proper follow up for your injuries. Right now we're just waiting on social services to figure out where you will be going from here... most likely it will be somewhere in Seattle." He leaned up against the wall across from me and I tried to interpret the look on his face, the slight glance towards the door to my room.

"Is that Edward?" I had gotten used to feeling his presence in the hall outside of my room before I would hear his voice when he came to relieve Esme in the afternoons. We didn't speak much but something always seemed to alert my senses when he was near. It was odd as I didn't seem to be as attuned to the others in the family as I was to him.

"Yes, he and Alice are just out in the hallway." Carlisle's brow was furrowed and once again I felt like I was missing something that was going on in their silent conversations. Some key piece of information that I just wasn't able to clue into.

"They can come in if they want." I didn't really want to see them but I did want to stop feeling like I was in the middle of some secret discussion.

"Hey Bella, how are you feeling?" Alice's bell-like voice carried across the room as they came in and I tried not to stare at the one posed as her brother, the one who my attention always seemed to be drawn to.

"Fine I guess..." It was my standard answer but they didn't push it as I watched Alice turn to glare at Edward before he opened his mouth, still not able to speak before Carlisle shook his head slightly at him.

"Whatever it is you might as well just let him say it." my voice was flat as I tried to hide my curiosity and I watched Alice glare once more at Edward before she floated across the room and sat in the chair, her arms folding stubbornly across her chest.

"Would you be opposed to living with us for the next six months or so?" To say that I was surprised by Edward's question was an understatement and as the three of them sat in the room watching me, awaiting an answer of some sort... I was once again left speechless.

I was trying to sort through my thoughts, to decipher the ones that were terrified of getting too close to anyone – especially vampires - and to push back the ones that were comfortable – too comfortable with the Cullens.

"I... I don't think that's a good idea..." Edward's face fell and I felt an odd pull, a sadness at his expression. "I just... I... I'm a human... and..." His expression was directed at his hands and the room fell into an awkward kind of silence, none of them moving or saying anything as I thought through Edward's offer.

It didn't make sense that they would want me there with them and I understood Carlisle and Alice's hesitancy to ask me. But I also felt a strange surge of disappointment as I wondered what it would be like to live with them and that odd pull to say yes, to stay with the Cullens – with Edward – was growing stronger.

I was beginning to picture it... to see the freedom it would bring me... when my memories began to invade the picture. Seeing him as he helped himself to my body, to my blood. His possessive nature and his mate's wrath. His face began to morph into that of Edward... then one by one each of the Cullens as I got lost in my thoughts, in images of the past.

A stone hand on my upper arm and my name being called pulled me back out of it and I blinked my eyes, surprised to find that I was curled up on the corner of my bed, my arms wrapped around my knees as my body trembled and I roughly pushed away the icy fingers.

"Are you..."

"Please... just leave me alone." I begged quietly, my nails digging into my legs as I watched their concerned expressions all around me. The flashback was still fresh in my head and I needed time alone to collect myself. Alice was the first to stand up to leave and I watched as she gave Edward a pointed look before he too stood and left with her.

"I'm sorry that we frightened you Bella," I was still trembling and gripping my legs as Carlisle backed away from the bed, "Edward – and the entire family – feel very protective of you and we just wanted you to know that it was an option if you were open to it." I felt awful for my reaction but my memories were still flashing in the back of my mind and I needed time by myself, time to think.

"Please. Just leave me alone for a little while... I just need... I need time to think..." I begged him and saw him nod in understanding before he silently turned around and left me to my thoughts.

An hour had passed before I finally found myself able to move from my curled up position and stretch out, my limbs stiff and sore as I began to pace my room. I still couldn't get Edward's words out of my head and I found myself beginning to analyze them further, wondering whether or not he had been serious, what the looks between the three Cullens had meant, wondering what was going to happen next.

The idea was sudden and beyond my control and I wasn't even sure if it was an idea at all or just my instincts kicking in, a need to escape, to get out, overpowering my senses.

Once I was dressed in my street clothes and carrying my backpack it was easy to pretend I knew where I was going, moving down to the main floor and out the doors without anyone glancing twice at me. It was when I was outside in the parking lot, looking around and trying to decide what to do next, where to go that things got difficult. I stood just outside the door for a few minutes, trying to decide which direction to go and battling my brain which was telling me to just turn around and return to my room. But I couldn't do that. I needed this.

So I threw all caution to the wind and just started walking.

Across the parking lot.

Down the street to the crosswalk.

Down the sidewalk towards the school.

Across the street.

A left turn and walking towards the highway.

I didn't have a plan and I didn't know where I was going, just that I needed to get out of Forks, away from everything.

The rain started to fall heavily on top of me, my thin sweater soaking quickly through.

I moved inside the forest at the edge of the road, looking for some sort of coverage.

My mind was blank as I tried to erase my past. Erase memories of Weston, of Cole, of my mom and Phil, of Charlie, of Him.

The rain was pounding down and I could no longer see more than a few inches in front of me, even under the cover of the trees hanging above me.

I continued to walk.

At some point the forest beside the road curved down and into a small valley, a rocky stream running through the middle of it. I stumbled down the hill and began to follow the water's edge.

"Are you alright Miss?" The deep voice startled me and I blinked through the rain, my hand moving to shelter my eyes, to see the man standing several yards in front of me. I stopped dead in my tracks and a ripple of fear flooded down my body at the sight of him. I couldn't answer and as I stood there frozen he began to move slowly towards me and I could make out some of his features, his shirtless body glistening in the rain, his dark eyes watching me carefully as I continued to stand there, trembling.

"Bella?" My head whipped around at the worried voice behind me, to the vampire standing on the other side of the valley. A low growl sounded from the man on the other side of me and another ripple of fear passed through my body at the sound.

"Get out of here Cullen. This isn't your land." I was confused again and turned to see the strange man nearly to where I was standing. Instinctively I took a step back from him.

"This isn't your land either... dog." I could feel myself getting dizzy, "Come on Bella, let's get you back to the hospital." Her voice was softer when she spoke to me but I still stayed planted in my spot between the two of them, unable to move.

"You aren't taking her anywhere." Another low growl and I turned back to see him practically vibrating in front of me, his fists clenched at his sides.

"Bella, come here." Rosalie's hand grabbed my arm softly and I stumbled back towards her just before the man in front of me disappeared, a massive reddish-brown animal – a wolf – taking his place, the sound of snapping and growls drowning my ears as my own screams got caught in my throat.

"Emmett! Jasper!" I heard Rosalie's voice calling loudly from above me but my mind was shutting down as my body collapsed into the stone woman, her arms easily picking me up.

"I'm sorry." I muttered gently, closing my eyes. I could still hear the growls from in front of me, only now there were hisses and growls coming from behind me as well, followed by a familiar feeling, an awareness of his presence... and I knew then that although I might not fully trust the rest of them... I trusted him.

**A/N: Sorry for the long delay in getting this up. It's been crazy busy around here! It's a bit of a longer chapter this time and quite a bit in it. I hope you enjoy! Please Read and Review!**

***Just a disclaimer here. I'm not a doctor or a lawyer or a social worker. I know there may be mistakes in this story but really I'm just writing it for fun and as much as I try to be accurate, things are going to slip through the odd time. **

**** I don't own anything Twilight. It all belongs to it's creator Stephenie Meyer who I am grateful allows us to play with her creations!**


	12. Chapter 11: Panic and Pain

"_**I'm sorry." I muttered gently, closing my eyes. I could still hear the growls from in front of me, only now there were hisses and growls coming from behind me as well, followed by a familiar feeling, an awareness of his presence... and I knew then that although I might not fully trust the rest of them... I trusted him.**_

My eyes were still squeezed tightly shut, the rain pelting down on my face. The growls coming from in front of me had quieted some but were still there, still threatening to me. I could hear Carlisle's voice speaking but I couldn't decipher it, my brain too shocked to be able to focus in on the words.

"Pass her over to me Rose." I was still in the blond vampire's arms but the sound of his voice and the nearness of his presence forced my eyes open, my body leaning magnetically towards his arms. And then I was being passed to him, my head leaning automatically against his chest.

"Are you hurt at all Bella?" I was looking up into his amber eyes, the dizziness gone as long as I focused my sight on one thing as he carried me out of the trees, towards a car that was parked on the edge of the road.

"N... no..." I stuttered slightly unsure of anything at the moment.

"You're absolutely frozen, let's get you warmed up and back to the hospital." His movements were smooth as we slid into the back seat of the car and a blanket was wrapped around me. As he tried to shift, to sit me up on the seat beside him I felt my fingers curl tightly into his shirt, gripping on to him, the thought of him putting me down suddenly terrifying.

"Is she alright?" Alice's voice chimed out as the front door of the car opened and closed, the vehicle beginning to move immediately towards the hospital.

I heard Edward answer her softly, telling her that I was cold but appeared unharmed. I couldn't speak myself though, my mind tired and confused, not even sure myself why I had run in the first place. When we arrived back at the hospital there was a flurry of people who immediately surrounded us, attempting to pull me out of Edward's arms so that they could dry me off and check me over. But at the sound of my shrill screams as they attempted to unclasp my fingers from his shirt they began to back off and I heard Esme's voice filter through the crowd as she came closer to us with Carlisle by her side.

"Let me try," her voice was as warm as the Arizona sun, but it didn't help my sudden anxiety at all and I pulled myself in tighter to Edward, not caring about the searing pain in my shoulder, or the ache in my broken fingers. I just knew that I was safe in his arms.

"Bella, you need to get out of these wet clothes." she said gently and I felt myself begin to shake. I still couldn't understand my own attachment to the vampire that was still holding on to me as I clung to him, but it was the only thing that I trusted, that I was sure of.

"Esme's right Bella, you're freezing, you need to get into some dry clothes and warm up." Edward's voice was soft and I continued to look up into his face, his eyes focused down on my own. Ever so slowly I felt my hands begin to relax their hold on him, but as I felt him begin to shift me down to the bed they tightened up again, the fear that he would leave me suddenly overwhelming.

"I'll be right outside the door Bella and I'll come right back if you want." he assured me but it wasn't good enough, it was beyond my control, I needed him with me. "No. Stay." I murmured softly and I felt him sigh. "I will stay, but I need to let you get changed and then I'll be right back." he tried to reassure me but I shook my head and one of my hands loosened it's grip, reaching for his hand and grabbing it as tightly as I could.

"Please stay here." I said again and he shifted his eyes to Esme before looking back down at me. "Let me set you on the bed and I'll stay right there behind you facing the other direction." I didn't say anything else but I let him put me down, my sore hand letting go of his shirt but my good hand remaining tightly in his. It didn't take long for Esme to help me out of the sopping wet clothes and into a fresh pair of flannel pajama's. After she helped me squeeze the excess water out of my hair she and Edward helped me into the bed and warm blankets were piled around me, finally stopping some of the chills that still rocked my body.

"Feeling a little better?" Edward asked as he sat down on the edge of the bed, his fingers still entwined with mine as Esme excused herself and told us she would be sending Carlisle in to look me over.

"I... I'm sorry... I didn't mean... to run..." I apologized gently and Edward's face relaxed slightly, his expression softening.

"It's my fault Bella, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to frighten you with my suggestion... I should have known better than to say anything. But you don't have to worry Bella, they've found you a foster home in Silverdale." I felt my heart-rate begin to skyrocket as he continued to tell me about where I would be going on my release from the hospital and I felt the ache in my fingers as I gripped his hand even harder.

"Please don't make me go... please... let me stay with you." I begged softly and watched as he rubbed his free hand across his face, light footsteps alerting me to another presence in the room with us.

"I don't think that living with us is the safest thing for you right now Bella." I felt my heart sink at Carlisle's words as he came over and sat in the chair beside the bed.

"Please let me stay." I didn't like how foreign my own voice sounded, the fear evident as I squeaked out the words. "Please. I take care of myself and won't get in the way... I'll do whatever you want if you let me stay... you can even... you can feed off of me if you want." I was barely speaking above a whisper and I watched as Carlisle shook his head sadly and then glanced up at Edward.

"Please?" I looked up at Edward this time and found his eyes shining with emotion.

"I'll see what I can do Bella... but let me look at your hand and your shoulder first." Carlisle stood up then and began to look me over. I never let go of Edward's hand though and something about the way he didn't force me to, the way he held on to me as well made me feel comforted, and somehow secure.

"I'm sorry Edward. I should have seen her running." I had been dozing off and on, afraid that if I fell into a deep sleep he would use the opportunity to leave, but at the same time knowing that I needed to sleep. The resulting haze I was in was the result of the tiredness, the groggy awareness that interfered with my ability to get a good, solid sleep.

"You can't see everything Alice... and she's tricky... I still can't hear any of her thoughts... I'm not surprised that her future is murky and her decisions not all clear to you." The confusion at his statement brought me further to the edge of waking up, my mind wondering if I was really hearing them correctly and what it meant.

"Esme will be here in five minutes Edward. We have to attend school tomorrow, if we don't it will cause an entire series of questions from both the school and the hospital." Alice spoke with such assurety and the pieces were starting to fit together inside of my tired brain. The room went quiet then and although I could still sense them both there with me, I began to panic at the thought of them... him... leaving me alone. Something within me began to ache at the thought of him not being there and I felt myself reach out, grabbing the first thing I could, my hands struggling to grip the icy-hardness.

"Bella?" His voice was like honey and I forced my eyes open, seeing my hand as it gripped his arm, not moving it even as I saw him watching me, trying to understand my sudden movement. I heard the door open and close softly and saw Esme come into my view. But I couldn't tear my eyes away from Edward's, couldn't pull my hand away from his arm.

"Are you alright Bella?" No, I wasn't alright. I didn't understand anything. I didn't understand how I was feeling so attached to this cold creature, this thing that probably wanted to kill me right now. I didn't understand why I was forced into the middle of the supernatural world, and how I had tried to escape and only managed to find more of the same thing. I didn't understand why I wanted nothing more than for Edward to stay, for him to hold my hand and never leave my side.

"I know that you're afraid right now Bella, but there is nothing to be afraid of. You are safe here." He spoke slowly and I felt him lift my hand off of his arm, sheer panic setting in before he shifted onto the bed beside me and took my hand back into his own. "Nothing will hurt you here." he said again and I swallowed thickly. I wanted to believe him but I wasn't even sure what exactly I was scared of.

I didn't say anything. My thoughts were still so jumbled, so unsure that I didn't know what else to say to them, so we stayed there as Esme came further in and sat down in the chair, smiling slightly at me as I tried to calm myself down.

Nobody spoke, nobody moved. Eventually I drifted back to sleep, exhaustion finally pulling me into the deep depths of sleep, where nightmares played on repeat through the night and late into the next morning. As I stretched my stiff muscles and opened my eyes to the sun shining brightly into the corner of my room, I was surprised to find that I was alone again my heart contracting painfully as my breathing instantly became more labored.

"Bella?" My eyes were squeezed tightly shut, my head resting between my knees as I struggled to take deep breaths, my body refusing to listen and becoming more and more out of my control as the ache began to intensify. I didn't understand what was happening, the panic I was feeling and as the voice came closer I tried to listen to what she was saying, to take deep breaths as she was instructing me to.

I could feel my heart racing as my chest continued to feel constricted, my breathing rapid.

"Breathe Bella," Esme's voice was soothing and I felt him pick up my hand, gently rubbing the palm as she continued to assure my that I was safe.

Gradually I felt my heart rate begin to slow, my breathing becoming more regulated, but the pain in my chest continued to throb, reaching out and aching as though searching for something. As I opened my eyes, I felt Esme's hand stop rubbing my palm, her eyes looking down at me from the side of the bed.

"How are you feeling Bella?" She asked cautiously and I couldn't help but to twist my neck and look around the room anxiously, not sure what exactly I was looking for as my hand came up to rub my chest absently.

"Better... I think..." I answered and still, my head moved from side to side, still searching for some unknown thing.

"Do you want to talk about anything?" Esme's question broke the silence a few minutes later and I shook my head roughly, "I'm not sure... I don't know what's wrong." I felt myself beginning to panic again, the pain throbbing harder and I forced myself to my feet, pacing the floor nervously back and forth. I saw Esme pick up her phone and without even looking at it, she seemed to be sending a message to someone.

My breathing was quickly picking up again the longer we stayed there and then suddenly everything shifted, my heart calming down as the door to my room was pushed open, Carlisle and Edward both coming quickly into the room. The ache instantly receded and without my control I felt my pacing shift, directing itself to Edward's side, his face slightly surprised as I reached out to grab his arm tightly, my breathing beginning to calm down as I did so. I glanced around the room nervously, knowing that my actions must have seemed strange to the others, but Carlisle and Esme didn't seem upset, a small smile playing at the corner of Esme's lips as she watched us.

"Feeling better Bella?" Edward's voice floated down to me knowingly and I knew then that he already knew the answer, that somehow he knew how I had been feeling in minutes before he entered the room.

"I don't understand it." I shook my head, tears springing to my eyes as I tried to sort out what had happened, but I couldn't figure it out. Everything was so jumbled, so confusing as everything ran through my head. It was too much to take in and I was beginning to feel the weight of it all crushing me.

"Why don't we take a walk Bella?" I felt Edward's arm wrap around my shoulders and I couldn't even nod my head before he began to lead me out of the familiar room and into the hallway, walking silently while I tried to calm myself down again.

As we walked through the glass door and onto the small visitor's patio he lead me to the side where he turned me in his arms and looked down at me before speaking softly.

"I think I need to tell you something Bella." I felt my heart sinking, my brain already trying to come up with the horrible things that he needed to tell me.

I shook my head, my eyes closing and I tried to fight the panic before I felt his grip on my upper arms tighten just slightly, his words telling me to calm down and look at him. Blinking my eyes to rid them of tears I looked up into his face, to the worry and... fear... that I saw there.

"Bella... I don't know how else to say this without scaring you." I was trying to keep up, the thoughts still running rampant through my head. This was it, this is where he finally told me what he wanted from me, what he was going to take from me. But while my head was telling me these things, my heart was arguing, my body leaning towards him, my heart trusting him, knowing that he wouldn't hurt me... that he couldn't.

"Bella, look up at me." he repeated gently and I did, I looked up into his amber eyes again and saw the torment there.

"I didn't want to let this happen Bella, but I feel so... so... protective of you. I know what you were feeling before I came back earlier Bella... because I felt it too." I felt my mouth drop open in surprise, my eyes searching his to look for the lie hidden beneath the words, but there was nothing there to indicate that he was being anything but honest with me.

"For the first time in nearly a century Bella I could feel my heart and it was in agony being separated from you. It felt like you and I shared a heart, each of us with half and I was simply incomplete without having you by my side, in my arms." I was still staring at him in shock as he continued to describe my very own experience. "It was so painful being apart from you, and I didn't think it would be possible for this to happen, with you being human and I still can't say I have any idea of what to do now..." "Are you saying... are we mated?" I interrupted, everything suddenly adding up, making sense. The expression on his face only confirmed my conclusion.

"You're not afraid of me?" His question was pained as he held onto me and I realized that he had actually been afraid of my reaction, of my rejection.

"No," I shook my head and felt myself lean in to him, his hands loosening their grip on my arms and coming to rest around my back in a light embrace. "I feel very safe with you." I whispered, knowing that he would hear me.

"I have to give you the choice Bella. Carlisle has gotten approval from social services for you to come and stay with us until you turn eighteen... but the option to go to the home in Silverdale is also still there if you want..." I didn't let him finish, pulling back and opening my mouth to speak, "No, I want to stay in Forks... with you."

**A/N: Wow. I know, it's been a while. I'm not sure how often I'll get to update this or any of my stories right now. Unfortunately real life has thrown me some real crap lately so time is very limited for writing/updating. I know there is a lot going on in this story and it seems like Bella is just not dealing with certain events, but keep in mind she is at her breaking point and there is a lot for her to process. And I also want to clarify that not everything will be simple like this between B and E, even though it seems like she's accepting it easily now. Everything will make more sense in due time!**

***Just a disclaimer here. I'm not a doctor or a lawyer or a social worker. I know there may be mistakes in this story but really I'm just writing it for fun and as much as I try to be accurate, things are going to slip through the odd time. **

**** I don't own anything Twilight. It all belongs to it's creator Stephenie Meyer who I am grateful allows us to play with her creations!**


	13. Chapter 12: Overwhelmed

"_**I have to give you the choice Bella. Carlisle has gotten approval from social services for you to come and stay with us until you turn eighteen... but the option to go to the home in Silverdale is also still there if you want..." I didn't let him finish, pulling back and opening my mouth to speak, "No, I want to stay in Forks... with you." **_

"What's the matter Bella?" I was curled into Edward's side in the backseat of the sleek black car that I was informed belonged to Carlisle. I had been in this car before, on the day they had found me wandering in the rain, nearly insane. This time though we were all leaving the hospital together and I knew that they could sense... could see my nervousness. It had been building throughout the afternoon, as we had returned to my room after Edward had explained to me the idea that we were mated.

It hadn't taken long once we had returned to my room for Carlisle to get the proper paperwork moving so that I could be immediately released to their care. After a brief conversation with the social worker I was told that I could leave that same day, the relief I felt at being free from the hospital soon overpowered by my growing fears.

To be honest, I wasn't exactly sure what I was afraid of. I trusted Edward. Instinctively I knew that he wouldn't... couldn't... hurt me. It was what made my body mould into his in the back seat of the car, what made his arm fit around my shoulder while my head rested against his chest. But as much as I knew he wouldn't hurt me, my experience with his kind... with people told me that he would, that at some point they all would.

He didn't try to pull any other information out of me for the rest of the short ride to the outskirts of town, his hand gently rubbing up and down my arm as we traveled quietly and I watched the trees and houses fly by, the car slowing down and turning down an invisible path that I surely would have missed if I were the one that was driving.

The longer we were on this tiny road, surrounded by trees... the more I panicked that they were taking me somewhere, that something suspicious was going on. And then I saw a break up ahead and realized that it wasn't a road, but a driveway that we were traveling on, a massive white house appearing at the end of the way.

The two other times I had been to this house I hadn't been able to take in the drive or the surroundings, the appearance of the outside of the house. Now though, as the car came to a stop I had a chance to really look at the house, the three story building charming from the outside, obviously an older structure that had been either immaculately maintained, or recently restored.

"This is where you live?" I squeaked out, not quite able to control the thought from popping out of my mouth and I looked up to see Edward smiling at me softly.

"Where we live." he corrected and then he was moving his arm out from around my shoulders as he opened the door and stepped out, offering me his hand to help me follow him. Taking it gladly I let him pull me out and back to his side, glad for the close contact, for the icy and yet somehow warm feeling that seemed to travel right through me and into him... and back again.

Leading me into the house I couldn't help but notice Esme and Carlisle walking slightly ahead of us, her hand in his as they opened the door and gestured for us to follow them inside. Taking a deep breath I squared my shoulders and was proud of myself for not hesitating as I walked inside with Edward.

The house was quiet as I walked into the large foyer and I took another deep breath as I took in the light and airy feeling of the room around me as Edward continued to lead me further into the house, pointing out the small powder room before we entered the large living room.

"We spend a great deal of time in here as a family..." Edward whispered softly as he continued to lead me by the hand. This was the most familiar room to me. I had been in here twice so far, but I had never picked up on any of the details before. Never paid attention to the unique antique furniture, the beautiful cream colour scheme... the back wall that appeared to be made entirely of glass.

"The kitchen..." he said again as he lead me into the large spotless kitchen and my mouth dropped open. I knew that the Cullens wouldn't be eating any of the same things that I would, but I also knew that I would be spending time in this room... my love of cooking a calming hobby of mine.

Leaving the kitchen we turned towards the grand staircase and Edward silently led me up the stairs, his hand still firmly in my own. On the second floor he pointed out Carlisle's study first, followed by the bedrooms of the mated couples of the house. At he end of the hall we approached another staircase and he pulled me up to where we could choose to go to one of two rooms where he lead me first to his. Opening his door I took in the black and gold themed interior, the walls of music, the open glass door that seemed to walk out and into the tree-tops.

"I hope that you don't mind, the only spare room we had was up here on the third floor next to mine." he said nervously and I followed him to the closed door, closing my eyes briefly as he opened it and then stood back, letting me walk in on my own.

"This is my room?" I asked in disbelief as I took in my surroundings. The décor was simple and I loved the dark wood furniture, the light neutral walls and carpet. My eyes immediately found the large bookcase on the wall and I focused in on it, reading some of the titles that had been placed on the shelves and allowing a small smile to form on my face.

"Yes, is it alright?" Edward asked and I could feel him behind me, his hand resting gently on my shoulder. I could sense someone else come in the room behind us and I turned to see Esme standing nervously in the doorway.

"We want you to be comfortable here Bella... if you want to change the furniture, the colours... anything just let me know and we can change it to suit your tastes." she said softly and I smiled at her, pulling away from Edward to go to her, my arms embracing her gently and taking both her and I by surprise.

"Thank you. This is more than I deserve..." I smiled sadly and moved further into the room, taking note of my bag from the hospital on the bed, the large closet door open to reveal a fully stocked wardrobe and another door only partially open but revealing my own washroom when I peeked inside.

After I had looked through all of the drawers, and explored the books on the shelves with more detail I returned to the entrance of the room where Esme and Edward were still standing.

"Do you need anything at all Bella? Everything should be fully stocked... the closet, the bathroom... there are fresh linens on the bed..." Esme seemed strangely nervous and I shook my head, I was grateful for their hospitality and wasn't intending to impose any more than I already felt that I was.

"Do you... do you mind if I make myself some dinner in the kitchen? It's been a while since I've eaten my own cooking and the food in the hospital... it was... interesting." I laughed nervously and Esme smiled widely.

"Help yourself to anything you want Bella, I'll come with you, it will be so nice to be able to actually use the kitchen!" She smiled happily and turned towards the stairs with me following after her, grabbing Edward's hand quickly, not yet willing to let him out of my sight.

I took my time in the kitchen. I opened all of the cupboards and drawers, and looked carefully at the different foods that had been bought and placed in the refrigerator before deciding what to make. Esme and Edward both sat on tall stools at the island and watched as I moved around, more comfortable in here than anywhere else as I made myself some dinner, cleaning up my mess as I went.

"Where is everybody else?" I asked as I sat down with my plate of steaming hot food, looking forward to eating something that I made myself again.

"The others went hunting following school... they will be back later this evening." I nodded as I took the first bite of my food, knowing that she was really saying that they didn't want to overwhelm me when I first got there.

I ate the rest of my meal in silence while Esme and Edward chatted quietly about small trivial things. I guessed that they were trying to put me more at ease, but it didn't work and once I had finished with my food I found my mind wandering, quickly becoming overloaded with the thoughts that seemed to want to flood me all at once. I was still confused and overwhelmed with the idea of being mated to Edward, and as much as I was grateful for the home that these strange vampires had offered me, I was also still wary and anxious. And then the thoughts of Cole and Weston began to seep into my mind and invade the sense of safety I had tried to envision. I knew that with Charlie alive, I would never stop worrying for Cole's safety.

"Bella?" Edward's voice caused me to jump back, my own little bubble evaporating as I remembered the two people in the room with me. Esme moved to come towards me and that was the end of my calm, my sanity. It was too much, too soon. The second her cold fingers brushed against my arm I panicked, pushing back from the island and running out of the room, pausing only briefly to consider where to go before I ran back up the stairs.

I didn't stop when I got to my room and flung the closet door open, walking inside and flinging myself into the darkest corner where I sat with my knees curled up to my chest, my head buried in my hands as the sobs began to consume me.

I'm not sure how long I sat in the corner crying, but it wasn't long before I felt Edward's presence in the room, his shadow in the door before he fell to his knees and crawled in next to me. Sniffling and wiping my cheek with the back of my hand I was surprised when I saw the uncertainty in his eyes as he hesitated beside me.

"Can I... are you... do you want to talk?" he asked unsure and I shook my head, sniffling again before I stuttered out an apology.

"I... I... I'm... sorry... I... just..." he stopped hesitating then and pulled me onto his lap. I gratefully gripped onto his shirt, burying my face in his chest as I began to cry again. I cried for everything. For Weston, for Cole, for my mother and for Charlie. I cried for everything that I had been through and I cried for all of the unknown until I had no more tears left to cry.

By the time I was finished, the exhaustion had set in again... but I knew I couldn't fall asleep again, not without giving an explanation of some sort.

"I'm sorry Edward." I was about to use the sleeve of my shirt to wipe my cheeks, but instead Edward beat me to it, his fingers gingerly wiping away the remnants of my tears. I didn't know what to say next so instead of saying anything, I sat quietly in Edward's lap, not wanting to move for fear that he would leave me alone again.

"May I be honest with you for a moment Bella?" I was a little worried about what he wanted to tell me, but almost as though he could sense I needed his reassurance, he pulled me even tighter to his chest, his head moving to rest against the top of mine. Nodding my head I closed my eyes while I waited for him to gather his thoughts.

"I don't understand a lot of what is happening between us Bella. I've been alone for so long and I'm afraid I'm new to all of this. Since this mating bond began to form, all that I've wanted is to protect you and keep you safe. But you've been through so much, and I can sense your fear and your uncertainty, your distrust and your sadness... so I don't know how to help you." I could feel the tears springing back to my eyes at his words, speechless by his admission and wanting him to know that I understood.

"This... this helps me." I whispered quietly and I felt his fingers on my chin, gently tilting my head up to look up at him. "I'm scared..." he tried to pull away the instant the words left my mouth and I instantly regretted them, "No, I'm not scared of you Edward." he seemed to relax again and I struggled to get out the rest of my words. "I'm scared of everything else."

"I swear to you Bella, I won't let anything..."

I cut him off before he could continue that sentence. I had no doubt with how I felt that he felt the same way and would do what he could to protect me, but there was so much more to it then that. "I'm not afraid of you Edward... but I'm afraid of this mating bond thing. I don't understand it and it scares me that I'm so dependent on being near you. I hate that I only feel calm when I'm touching you, the panic and pull that I feel when I'm not physically close to you. And while I know logically after spending time with you and everyone that you won't hurt me... my experience with vampires says something different and I can't help being afraid that I'll turn around and you won't have those strange topaz eyes anymore, that they'll be red and hungry and after me. Even worse than all of that though I'm even more terrified for Cole, I'm scared that Charlie will find him... or that Renee will do something, help him somehow." I was still crying when I finished and Edward was still holding me tightly, rocking me slightly as he let me vent my frustrations.

He didn't speak and for that I was again thankful. As much as I wanted to trust him, I knew that it would take time for me to fully believe that I was safe with a house full of vampires, to believe that my son was out of Charlie's reach for good. And I was glad that he seemed to understand that, simply holding me while I cried, while I allowed him briefly to understand my fears.

As much as I fought it, the exhaustion continued to creep up on me until, still sitting on the floor of the closet, wrapped in Edward's arms, I finally gave in to sleep and to the nightmares that came with it.

The next time that I woke up it was dark in the room and I could feel the softness of the bed that I had been laid in. I couldn't feel Edward touching me, but my senses told me that he was near and I pushed myself up, searching for him in the darkness. I was still reeling from my dream and I needed him near me, touching me.

"Edward?" I asked cautiously and I heard the slight rustle of fabric as he moved on my left, moving to sit down beside me and take my hand.

"Are you alright?" he asked carefully and I shook my head, not knowing where to even start. It was still so strange... I felt like I didn't know him at all, but somehow my instincts, my body did.

"Can you tell me a little bit about yourself?" I asked him quietly a few minutes later and saw him shift nervously next to me. "What do you want to know Bella?" he replied and I shook my head again before answering, "Well, I don't really know you at all. So I guess I want to know... everything."

**A/N: This chapter is a little slow moving but I wanted to convey just a little bit of the confusion, fear, and overwhelming emotion that Bella is having to deal with. Obviously the emotions have been building with her for a while and it's about time that she starts to deal with them :) **

***Just a disclaimer here. I'm not a doctor or a lawyer or a social worker. I know there may be mistakes in this story but really I'm just writing it for fun and as much as I try to be accurate, things are going to slip through the odd time. I also want to add that some of the events in my stories tend to be based on things that I've experienced and I try to make my characters react as they would in the real world. You may or may not agree with the way I always write things, but that's okay. That's what makes fiction so great!**

**** I don't own anything Twilight. It all belongs to it's creator Stephenie Meyer who I am grateful allows us to play with her creations!**


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